"She's kind, but she's broken."

"Her heart is good because it's been shattered before."

"She smiles, but deep down she's breaking."

Oh my gosh, shut up.

I'm sorry to be so harsh, but seriously, shut up.

Up and down my Facebook feed I see dozens of posts like this with captions like, "so true," with a broken heart emoji. I get it, these girls have been through some shit to be posting stuff like this, but what do they think these kind of posts are going to do? Do they think some guy is going to see them and decide to be the one to fix her? It's a bit silly.

I fully believe that in order for someone to love you, you have to fully love yourself. It's hard to love yourself with low self-confidence and the idea that heart break is inevitable. With that kind of attitude, you'll never be in a healthy, loving relationship. I get that these posts are meant to convey the idea that the poster is a kind soul that has been through the wringer. However, it doesn't come off that way.

When I see posts like this, I see someone with a broken heart desperately calling out to be saved by someone. There lies the problem; you should be the one to mend your broken heart. To rely on another person is just down right dumb. Self-love and self-care come before any new relationship.

I know if a guy told me that he felt broken by past relationships, I'd see that as a red flag and run. Sure, our past can hurt us, but those experiences should be like scars, not open wounds. We should use those experiences to learn and better ourselves and our choices. To go about life complaining about your broken heart hoping some knight in shining armor will come and make it all better is ridiculous.

Please stop pretending it's normal to let failed relationships completely create identities. Take your broken heart and fix it, I don't care how long it takes. Do it for your heart, its clearly been through enough.