The ingredients to build a relationship are a little more complicated than just a bouquet of flowers and a box of candy.
Relationships. Long distance or not, significant others are much more than just that. I would be lying if I said I did not love the sweet gestures that only a boyfriend can give. The flowers, funny phone calls, hand holding, breakfast dates, and tight hugs are special but my relationship and many others out there exist on much more than just these little gestures. It is a tricky concoction that consists of one part boyfriend and two parts best friend and would not work without one part or the other. While having a relationship may not be quite as easy as baking a batch of cookies, it has its own recipe (with a few variations for flavor) to follow for a good match.
This recipe begins with a dash of awkwardness and smiles. Maybe you were set up on a blind date or have known each other for years, either way, once the ingredient of “more than friends” is thrown into the mix, it is a whole new ballgame. In my case, it began with lots of pure annoyance, time, and forced proximity. My boyfriend was quite literally the most annoying person I had ever met. Imagine the little boy on the playground who never stops pulling your hair and making fun of you? Yes, that’s him except rather than five years old and on a playground we were much older and worked together. Trick phone calls on work phones became a common occurrence from him as well as constant humiliation in front of customers. Sounds like the perfect start to a relationship right? After having to work with this five year old boy for a year, he finally began to grow on me. Remember the essence of time? Very important in this particular recipe because this time would eventually call for the friendship that I mentioned earlier.
After allowing this annoyance to settle in, friendship began to ferment. Whether it takes you seconds or months, a relationship is nothing without a huge scoop of friendship. It took this friendship months to emerge but once it did, a whole can of laughter and smiles had been opened. A relationship-friendship is unique because the significant other wants to know the big and little things, the ins and outs, the real you. Being working buddies, the real us was known from the start. Yes, you can flip-flop this crucial ingredient placement to another time in the relationship but it simply will not work without it. Like I said, two parts best friendship. This “friend zone” relationship was eventually matched with the awkwardness and smiles of something more. A first date of sweaty hands and nervousness but from the start I knew this was the right recipe for me.
This awkwardness was quickly overtaken by the “ever-important” friendship that I mentioned. The connection of a significant other became real. Time is added, yet again, to this recipe, though a different kind. This time is laced with memories made together. This time is the final ingredient to the recipe. A bond with your significant other can only grow with age. It is that time spent with one another that becomes necessary for the best friendship to continue. No, my recipe is not complete nor will it ever fully be. This relationship stuff is not about making it to the finish line because there isn’t one. There will always be more “things” you did not know about each other and more memories to make. Keep adding your ingredients and building up your recipe every day to make the best match you possibly can. Because though every recipe may be a little different, they are all just as sweet on the inside.