Massachusetts is more than a state full of people sipping Dunkin iced coffee in the middle of a snow storm. It is a state built on the feeling of pride. From any outsider’s perspective, we are just seen as a bunch of Tom Brady loving, Yankee’s hating, accent talking people, but Massachusetts is so much more than that. First of all, we have some of the most beautiful beaches in the country. If you’ve ever been to Carson Beach in South Boston or 40 Steps in Nahant, or basically any beach here, you know exactly what I’m talking about. There is nothing better than going to the beach with your friends during the summer and just soaking up the sun and lying on the soft sand.
Everyone already knows about our amazing sports scene here, but outsiders can’t truly understand why everyone would give an arm and a leg for our sports heroes. We are built on our hate from outsiders. We love it when you try to tell us deflate gate was real, or that the Red Sox aren’t looking good. It only fuels our fire and we are able to get behind our teams even more. So when someone says that Patriot’s fans are loud and obnoxious, thank you! You’re the reason we were able to make a 25 point comeback in the Super Bowl this year. Honestly if you don’t have a city of champions among you, I feel sorry for you, because Massachusetts sees a lot of professional championships, and the parades are wicked pissah.
Another thing that makes my heart happy about living here is the weather. Around here, it doesn’t matter that there’s 6 feet of snow, life goes on. We never have to worry, our Dunkin Donuts five minutes from our house will always be available to get our delicious coffee and bagel. Also with our bodies being accustomed to any type of weather, any day can be a beach day of you really want it to.
There’s no arguing that Massachusetts residents have a “different” way of talking, and we will tell you it’s the correct way. Here is a short guide on how the correct masshole way to talk is:
- That thing you drink water out of, yeah it’s a bubbler.
- Wanna change the TV channel, better grab the clickah
- Want rainbow on your ice cream? Order sprinkles! Chocolate? Better ask for some jimmies
- Throwing something away? Locate the nearest barrel and you’re all set to go
- Did you make a wrong turn somewhere? Better bang a Uey!
The list goes on and on, but the point is I would not want to talk any other way. Do you realize how fun it is to talk to someone who is from out of state and them being so confused with your language? If you haven’t tried it yet, I highly recommend it.
If I was from somewhere else, I don’t think my life would be as much fun. Where else would I be able to get away with drinking iced coffee all year long? What if Tom Brady wasn’t someone I referred to as God? The point is, if you’re from Massachusetts, you are Boston Strong, and wicked pissah.
