Transferring to a new University is exciting, but what a lot of people forget to tell you, is that it can be lonely. Transfer students often come to a University after completing a few years at a community college, or deciding that they want to change Universities all together. Like any other change throughout life, it can be hard and lonely at times.
A lot of effort from Universities goes into recruiting new freshman, but from personal experience as a two-time transfer student, not much effort goes into helping transfer students become a part of the University and student culture. College is where you figure out who you are, and where you discover new things about yourself that you never knew existed. Finding things that you enjoy to do while you are engaged in your studies is crucial/
After discussing the transition to a new University with several individuals, it has come to my attention that my past struggle as a transfer student was also a struggle for other individuals. After spending months in my room on the evenings doing homework and Netflix and chilling by myself, I finally started to break the ice of being at a new school. So, here is my advice to students who are struggling to make friends and find a place at their new school:
Put Yourself Out There
Even if it means going to an event alone, just do it. You are never going to grow if you keep doing the same things over and over again, and you certainly will never meet new people. Going to an event or group alone can be terrifying the first time, especially if you go and no one interacts with you or acknowledges your presence. Do not let that discourage you. Remember that everything in life is a matter of perspective, and at a new place you have the ability to play whatever cards in your hand that you want.
Don’t make finding new friends your only mission, by trying to make friends you are already setting yourself up with expectations. You will not make a best friends overnight in most cases. You have to be patient. Instead of getting involved with something solely to make friends, get involved with something that truly interests you. By doing do, you will be around people that enjoy similar things that you do, and that is what college is about, exploring and understanding you.
Consider Getting a Part Time Job
Even though studies can take up most of your time, what better way to interact with other humans, than having to work together with them or interact with them on a daily basis. In school, I had to work several jobs to afford my tuition, but it also helped me become immersed in the community. On campus jobs do not pay much, but they offer benefits such as meeting other students, which pay off more for you than you think.
Stop Sitting Inside and Feeling Sorry for Yourself
Even though it might feel like it, everyone on campus is not ignoring you. If you isolate yourself, it can lead to problems such as increased anxiety and depression. Your best bet to getting out of your new student funk, is to put yourself out there and get involved. Other students who started their college career as a freshman at your University have an advantage in making friends because they most likely were in dorms with several people.
Do not let this discourage you. Hundreds of individuals transfer to a University every semester and are going through the exact same thing that you are. The best way to get yourself out of your lonely state is to be pro-active and do something about it.
