20 Ways To Get Over A Breakup

20 Ways To Get Over A Breakup

And words to live by.

Breakups suck. There's no way around that. But there are ways to make it better.

1. Have a good cry (or seven).

Let it all out. Embrace the sadness you’re feeling immediately after a breakup. If you don’t properly mourn and deal with the sad feelings you have, you won’t be able to get over the breakup. Cry until you can’t cry anymore, and you might be surprised by how much better you feel.

2. Indulge in your favorite treat.

I’m not saying you should turn to eating as a coping mechanism, but there is no shame in indulging in your favorite treat after a heartbreak. Head to the grocery store and pick up your favorite Ben & Jerry’s, or Oreo cookies. Sharing is not required.

3. Go shopping.

A little retail therapy never hurt anybody.

4. Pamper yourself.

Get your hair done, get a mani-pedi. Treat yourself, girl, because you deserve it.

5. Blast your favorite female artist.

Beyonce, Taylor Swift, Carrie Underwood- whoever it may be, put on your favorite CD and blast the music as loud as you can. Sing your heart out. Clean your house. Have a dance party by yourself. Music will lift you up, especially if it’s girl-power music. Try Katy Perry’s “Part of Me" or Christina Aguilera's "Fighter."

6. Have a girls' night out.

Getting ready is half the fun of going out. Get dolled up with your favorite makeup and hair products, toss on your favorite going-out outfit and high heels, and go out with your girl friends for a night on the town. Go to your favorite restaurant or bar, and embrace the beautiful, unattached woman you are!

7. Or a girls' night in.

Grab a carton of your favorite ice cream, and curl up on the couch with your best girl friends. Put on a funny movie (or three) and laugh your heart out.

8. Play a fun game.

Gather around the table with your closest friends and a bottle of wine, and settle into a game of Cards Against Humanity, What Do You Meme, or What’s Yours Like? I’ve played these games with my best friends and laughed so hard I cried. Fun games like these are a great way to lighten the mood. Laughter is the best medicine.

9. Take a trip to the local library.

Check out some fun books from the library and escape into a world of fiction.

10. Have “me” time.

Take a hot shower, and put in a hair treatment or face mask. Recline with a good book or your latest Netflix addiction, and just relax for the night. Treat yourself like the queen that you are!

11. Call your mom.

A nice phone call to your mom can work wonders, especially when you’re hurting. You should never feel ashamed to reach out and ask for some help when you need it.

12. Clean your apartment.

Blast some music and clean your place from top to bottom. You may be surprised how much better you'll feel.

13. Redecorate.

Pick out a new phone case and background. Take down old pictures from your wall and put up new ones. This will create a change in scenery, which can, surprisingly, help immensely when getting over a break up.

14. Adopt a hobby.

After a breakup, you find a lot more free time on your hands. Spend some time to learn calligraphy or paint. Cook and bake recipes that are shared all over Facebook, or finally attempt those crafts that have been sitting on your Pinterest forever. Trying something new is fresh and exciting!

15. Reconnect with old friends.

Take advantage of your free time to call up friends you haven't seen in years. They'll be thrilled to hear from you, and you can catch up over coffee or lunch.

16. Work out.

Join a gym, take up yoga, or go for a run around the block. Endorphins released during exercise are good for the mind and body.

17. Take a class.

Take a local cooking, dance, or pottery class. Find something that interests you and try it out! You'll have fun, learn some things, and make some friends.

18. Spend an entire day at your favorite place.

Whether it be the beach, the mall, or your favorite hiking trail, take a warm Saturday to just go and spend the whole day there. Do what makes you happy.

19. Get back out there.

When you're ready, get back out into the dating game.

20. Never forget to love yourself.

Cover Image Credit: Tumblr

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Relationship Abuse: Getting Caught Up In Making Someone Else Happy That You Forget About Your Own Happiness

Keep fighting for your sanity

Over the past few weeks I’ve had some major changes take place in my life. I’ve moved from Connecticut back to my home state of Georgia. I’ve ended a horrible relationship and the sad part is; I don’t even miss him. Yes, there were a few tears, but they weren’t sad ones. More like tears of utter joy and freedom.

So, my question to you is: when do you know that it’s time to break up? When is enough, enough?

Just a little run down on my past relationship to fill you so I can be justified in my decision to part ways. I spent the most of my time caring for the other person and trying to make their life perfect. I didn’t complain because Lord knows he did enough of that for the both of us.

My time, energy, and emotions were constantly spent trying to be everything that I possibly could for him and, yet I constantly asked myself if it was enough. I got so caught up in trying to make someone else happy that I completely lost sight of my true happiness.

I suffered in silence most of the time except when I had met my mental capacity for the bullshit. I put myself in counseling because I needed the time to just get it all out. I needed someone to vent my frustrations to. I would leave my sessions feeling drained and just spent from all the emotions that would come out.

My cellphone was a tracking device. I couldn’t be gone an hour without that all too familiar call of ‘where are you? When will you be back?’

It drove me to the point of madness, not like crazy madness. Just that state of mind. I was irritable and always in a horrible mood. I felt trapped and smothered. I know that a committed relationship is a big step.

Living together is a must but then it comes to the point when you suffer emotionally from the strain that the relationship puts on you I think it’s time to walk away. But the person I lived with didn’t want to take me for my word that I was unhappy and wanted a break. So, what was I to do?

How was I supposed to make them see? What was it going to take?

When I decided that I had finally had enough I did the only thing I could do. I booked a flight back to Georgia and decided that was where I was going to stay. Even after saying that I was done, just finished and couldn’t take anymore he still called trying to change my mind. ‘I’ll change, I’ll be better.’

I still couldn’t deal with the fact that he simply wasn’t hearing me. I mean how many ways can a person say that they need space before the other person gets the hint?

And of course, I was made out to be the bad one. I was causing him pain and I didn’t care about him. That’s all he ever cared about; his well-being. If I was unhappy it was ok because it didn’t affect him, and my problems were mine to work through on my own. There was no US unless HE was happy.

Every friend I talked to told me the same thing. Get out and walk away!

So, would you? Would you leave a relationship after you’ve tried talking to the person and explaining your unhappiness and they still wouldn’t listen?

Would you feel better after suffering months of mental and emotional abuse to finally walk out and gain back your freedom and sense of self-worth?

I suffered from relationship abuse, don’t let the same thing happen to you. If you’re fighting for your sanity and trying to keep yourself from going crazy; take my advice and leave while you can. Don’t stay trapped.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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It's Hard To Accept The Apology He Never Gave You

Even though you deserve for him to be sorry, it's OK if he's not.

One of the hardest things to do is find a way to move on without closure. It’s picking yourself up without ever understanding why everything became a mess in the first place.

It’s drowning in sorrows, soaking up all the pain and watching your self-worth dwindle away while you wait for the apology that is never going to come.

The thing is, sometimes you really do deserve an apology.

A person’s inability to acknowledge how they mistreated you is not a reflection of you as a person. He spun you in circles, drowned your heart in confusion and left you dizzy and broken.

But even though you deserve for him to be sorry, and you deserve for him to say it, you absolutely do not need it.

Somewhere along the way, someone convinced you that the only way to have closure was to have one last, heartfelt conversation with him. You just want some explanation as to why he was tearing you apart.

But let me ask you this, does that really make it better?

Is being destroyed in person better than through a text? Is that last conversation going to mend all the broken pieces you’re left with in the end?

He was unfair. He was wrong. He should be sorry.

But it’s OK if he's not.

Just because you deserve better, doesn’t mean what you once had didn’t mean something. Things that broke along the way do not remove your value, nor what that man once meant to you.

You’ve allowed this to define you and strip you of your self-worth. You’ve allowed yourself to believe that you cannot move forward without receiving some sort of validation for what happened.

Well here is your validation:


You don’t need him to say he’s sorry. You don’t need him to miss you. You don’t need him to regret the situation.

You are more than enough.

You are valid in your feelings and your frustration. You are valid in your want for closure and for a genuine apology.

I am sorry it has come to this. I am sorry you are heartbroken.

But as far as moving on, you’ve got this.

You are OK, and even if you’re not, it’s OK to not be OK. Closure is just accepting that a situation is over and finding a way to move on.

Accept that you deserve an apology. That’s all you really need. You deserve it. You are worth it. You are absolutely amazing on your own.

So pick yourself up, and fly.

You’ve got this.

Cover Image Credit: 123rf

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