The "Nice Girl" Syndrome Is Real

The 'Nice Guy' Syndrome Has Spread To Women, And It Is Terrifying

No, you're not alone because you're too nice; that's not a thing.

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We've all met at least one "nice guy" in our lives. You know, the guy who claims to be a nice gentleman who treats women like queens but is actually an immature, jealous ticking time bomb? The "nice guy" syndrome became a huge meme a few years back when people started posting about their experiences with these lovely lads to social media. The most typical interactions with the self-proclaimed "nice guy" usually start with his interest in a girl who isn't interested back, and after she politely declines his advances, he does a 180 and calls her a bitch or a slut and then whines about how nice guys like him never get a chance.

Even though the "nice guy" syndrome hasn't gone away, there seems to be an uprising of the self-proclaimed "nice girl," who is just like the "nice guy" in every way. The "nice girl" has typically been hurt in the past and boasts a heart of gold. She can be seen posting on social media about what an amazing and caring girlfriend she is and how she isn't like other women because she doesn't party and hook-up with random guys every weekend. However, like the "nice guy," she doesn't actually possess the traits she brags about. Rather, she is just like the women she claims to be the complete opposite of.

At first, I didn't really see how many girls I follow on social media were displaying these behaviors. I finally noticed after watching some great videos by a YouTuber named Cuestar. I realized that a lot of my female Facebook friends posted the same memes that the typical "nice girl" would post.

The "nice girl" syndrome hasn't been as popular as the "nice guy" syndrome, but it's just as prevalent and annoying. It must be exhausting for these girls to constantly believe that they are better than other women and that the reason they have so much trouble getting a guy is that they're so nice. Absolutely nothing about that logic makes any sense. If you're having so much trouble dating, perhaps you aren't as nice as you seem.

I'm over this whole "nice guy," "nice girl" movement. Nobody is too nice for a relationship, absolutely nobody. You're not better than anyone else, you're not single because you have a heart of gold, and you've definitely got other problems to deal with.

To quote the iconic Vine from Jed Lee, "niceness is great, you just have so many other traits that are so un-fuckable that it distracts us from your niceness."

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Why You Should Stop Chasing Him

You deserve better.
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They say “the thrill of the chase" makes someone more enticing. There's just something about wanting something you can't have that drives you crazy (in a good way). There is never a dull moment. Pursuing him is a challenge. Nothing comes easily. What's the fun in that anyway?

I'm going to tell you this: stop chasing him. Stop forgiving him when he forgets to answer your text messages and phone calls. Stop being the one to always make plans. Stop letting him bail on you. Stop waiting around for him. Stop being lied to. Stop making excuses when he doesn't make time for you. There is a difference between someone who is “hard to get" and a flat out jerk who doesn't give you the time of day. Stop letting him use you.

You deserve to be with someone who makes you fall asleep every night in the middle of texting him because neither of you want the conversation to end. You deserve someone who plans dates for the two of you. You deserve someone who asks you to hang out before midnight. You deserve someone who wants to spend time with you just as much as you do with them. You deserve someone who insists on paying for your ice cream. You deserve someone who won't deceive you. You deserve someone who is straightforward. You deserve attention. You deserve affection. You deserve a partnership that is mutual, not one-sided. You deserve to be chased.

You are better than 3 a.m. “Hey" texts. You are better than a night spent watching a movie just to fool around. You are better than trying to decode his vague messages. You are better than his shadiness. You are better than mind games. You are better than being ignored.

If you have to chase him, he's not worth it. Don't settle for someone who makes you beg for his attention. If he is genuinely interested in getting to know you, he will put in the effort. A relationship where your feelings are reciprocated is far more rewarding than one where you constantly feel like you have to drag him along.

Change your mentality. Become more independent. Be confident, be bold. Find happiness in being alone. Don't waste your time pathetically chasing after someone who doesn't feel the same, but doesn't have the heart or the courage to tell you so. Your self-confidence and positivity will make you radiant, and eventually, you will attract the kind of guy who is mature enough to not mess with your head.

Cover Image Credit: weheartit.com

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Ghosting Is Not Only Annoying, It’s Childish—Get Your Act Together And Respond

It's time to stop ignoring conversations.

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The term ghosting is defined as the practice of ending a personal relationship with someone by suddenly and without explanation withdrawing from all communication. (Also, how sad is it that it actually has coined definition.) Whether you are ignoring your co-worker, friend, tinder match, mom, I can guarantee you that everyone, at least once, has ghosted on someone.

And it's understandable. That's how our society is built now. If you don't like something, you stop using it and move on to something else. If you don't want to be in a conversation, you ignore it and move to the next conversation. But when you begin to do that with every conversation, you are no longer communicating. You're just being childish.

Ghosting is easy because if you don't like how the conversation is going, you can just exit out of your messaging app and pretend it never happened. But the problem is that the other person that's involved with that conversation can't pretend like it never happened. The intention behind the ghosting is still there. Whether you are mad at that person, feel uncomfortable, or just don't want to listen what the other has to say, the receiving communicator will still know what you're feeling because you can't think of a response. The "ghoster" just couldn't face their issues and decided to hide behind a screen. And that's infuriating. If you can't handle the responsibility or responding, you shouldn't be able to start a conversation at all.

Of course, it's easier said than done, but we need to get back into the habit of finishing conversations. We need to be able to face our problems and know how to communicate them to others. We need to understand true interaction if we want to be able to have a real relationship with other people. So stop being annoying. Stop being childish. Respond.

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