DTR means to define the relationship. Since when did this become such a tricky thing that pretty much everyone around me seems to avoid? These days, there are all kinds of relationships that people are in and if you're happy, by all means, you do you. I'll definitely admit, I've been in different types of relationships with different people and some I was afraid to give a label or meaning to.

But here's the thing, I've started wondering why we would rather be confused and almost on edge. When asking my friends the answer I usually get is, "well, if we don't DTR then there's no way I could be rejected or be without him." As this sunk in I knew this was a mindset I have 100% been in before and that worried me.

We shouldn't be scared of rejection or being alone, especially if it means we could be happier and healthier knowing the status of a relationship. The constant wondering and sometimes stressing over what kind of relationship you are in is NOT WORTH IT! I've started to be in this mindset where I would rather ask the "what are we" question sooner than later, and possibly even too soon if it means I have an answer. I feel like this helps both me and the other person know what the other is thinking so we don't waste our time.

Yes, opening this topic up for conversation can be scary and you may worry that you're asking way too soon. And yes, to the other person it might seem early. I think we need to have these conversations because it lets us into each other's headspace. I would feel much more comfortable with someone telling me they are linking how things are going and want to get to know me more, or someone upfront telling me they aren't looking for a relationship in the beginning.

While defining the relationship at any time may seem scary and it may sting at first, it's a conversation that is necessary so let's make this a normal and accepted thing to do.