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36 Thoughts Every Girl Has When Swiping On Bumble

They look way too much like my ex...

Teylor Veliotis

Aug 05, 2019

Fordham University

New Girl/20th Century Fox

I promise I'm not psychic. I just know how it is. If you're a fellow Bumble Bee, you know you've had these thoughts:

1. Did he really think leading with a picture of him and his dog would make me swipe right? Well, he got me.

2. Oh my God, a picture of him and a baby. My ovaries just exploded.

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3. I’m convinced that Bumble is not a dating app... it’s a game.

4. His jawline can cut a bitch.

5. New dream destination: your abs.

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6. I would love to not be the person that has to start this conversation right now.

7. My best friend swiped right on this guy so, naturally, I have to swipe left.

8. He COOKS?! Automatic keeper.

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9. One day I’m hoping the real Zac Efron or Jake Gyllenhaal will magically appear on here.

10. Imagine finding your husband on here and having to explain this to your kids and grandkids…

11. Do guys really think girls are going to swoon over a picture of them with a cigar in their mouth?

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12. Is every guy on here named Jake?

13. Alright. That’s it. I’m swiping right for the cat.

14. Hold up: is this a mugshot?

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15. I’m crossing my fingers while swiping right for this one because I pray to God he’s a match.

16. Bumble is my new favorite sport.

17. You’re probably a f*ckboy, but let’s swipe right just for the hell of it.

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18. This guy only has pictures of him with other guys so I can’t tell which one he even is. Your loss, buddy.

19. Why do guys feel the need to put up pictures with a bunch of girls around them?

20. There is no way this guy is 25 years old.

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21. Wow! I’ve never seen The Vessel before!

22. OK, he probably doesn’t even know the girls in this picture.

23. Oh, GOD, I did not just see this kid from my middle school on here, did I?

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24. Congratulations! You’ve been to a famous landmark outside of our country.

25. Ugh, that V-line though.

26. These cheesy pick-up lines are getting old really fast.

27. For the billionth time, I’m just going to write: “hey ;)”

Giphy Discover & share this Fox GIF with everyone you know. GIPHY is how you search, share, discover, and create GIFs.

28. Another cat picture? Thank God.

29. Men… in… uniform… though.

30. Beer cans, red cups, and cigars, oh my!

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31. A picture of him and his mom: family man or mama’s boy?

32. You Juul? Incredible! Say no more, I’m ready to get married.

33. This guy looks way too much like my ex.

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34. Damn it, I swiped the wrong way.

35. This swiping is getting pretty addicting.

36. What am I actually doing on here?

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36 Thoughts Every Girl Has When Swiping On Bumble

They look way too much like my ex...

1. Did he really think leading with a picture of him and his dog would make me swipe right? Well, he got me.

2. Oh my God, a picture of him and a baby. My ovaries just exploded.

3. I’m convinced that Bumble is not a dating app... it’s a game.

4. His jawline can cut a bitch.

5. New dream destination: your abs.

6. I would love to not be the person that has to start this conversation right now.

7. My best friend swiped right on this guy so, naturally, I have to swipe left.

8. He COOKS?! Automatic keeper.

9. One day I’m hoping the real Zac Efron or Jake Gyllenhaal will magically appear on here.

10. Imagine finding your husband on here and having to explain this to your kids and grandkids…

11. Do guys really think girls are going to swoon over a picture of them with a cigar in their mouth?

12. Is every guy on here named Jake?

13. Alright. That’s it. I’m swiping right for the cat.

14. Hold up: is this a mugshot?

15. I’m crossing my fingers while swiping right for this one because I pray to God he’s a match.

16. Bumble is my new favorite sport.

17. You’re probably a f*ckboy, but let’s swipe right just for the hell of it.

18. This guy only has pictures of him with other guys so I can’t tell which one he even is. Your loss, buddy.

19. Why do guys feel the need to put up pictures with a bunch of girls around them?

20. There is no way this guy is 25 years old.

21. Wow! I’ve never seen The Vessel before!

22. OK, he probably doesn’t even know the girls in this picture.

23. Oh, GOD, I did not just see this kid from my middle school on here, did I?

24. Congratulations! You’ve been to a famous landmark outside of our country.

25. Ugh, that V-line though.

26. These cheesy pick-up lines are getting old really fast.

27. For the billionth time, I’m just going to write: “hey ;)”

28. Another cat picture? Thank God.

29. Men… in… uniform… though.

30. Beer cans, red cups, and cigars, oh my!

31. A picture of him and his mom: family man or mama’s boy?

32. You Juul? Incredible! Say no more, I’m ready to get married.

33. This guy looks way too much like my ex.

34. Damn it, I swiped the wrong way.

35. This swiping is getting pretty addicting.

36. What am I actually doing on here?

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The Best Lines from the Fab Four

And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make

The sun is up, the sky is blue, it's beautiful and so are you

Love is old, love is new, love is all, love is you

There's nowhere you can be that isn't where you're meant to be

Life is very short, and there's no time for fussing and fighting, my friend

He say, "I know you, you know me", One thing I can tell you is you got to be free

Oh please, say to me, You'll let me be your man. And please say to me, You'll let me hold your hand

It was twenty years ago today, Sgt. Pepper taught the band to play. They've been going in and out of style, but they're guaranteed to raise a smile

Living is easy with eyes closed, misunderstanding all you see

Can you hear me? When it rains and shine, it's just a state of mind

Little darling, it's been long cold lonely winter. Little darling, it feels like years since it' s been here. Here comes the sun, Here comes the sun, and I say it's alright

We danced through the night and we held each other tight, and before too long I fell in love with her. Now, I'll never dance with another when I saw her standing there

I love you, I love you, I love you, that's all I want to say

You say you want a revolution. Well you know, we all want to change the world

All the lonely people, where do they all come from. All the lonely people, where do they all belong

Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends

Hey Jude, don't make it bad. Take a sad song and make it better

Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away. Now it looks as though they're here to stay. Oh, I believe in yesterday

And when the brokenhearted people, living in the world agree, there will be an answer, let it be.

And anytime you feel the pain, Hey Jude, refrain. Don't carry the world upon your shoulders

I'll give you all I got to give if you say you'll love me too. I may not have a lot to give but what I got I'll give to you. I don't care too much for money. Money can't buy me love

All you need is love, love is all you need

Whisper words of wisdom, let it be

Blackbird singing in the dead of night, Take these broken wings and learn to fly. All your life, You were only waiting for this moment to arise

Though I know I'll never lose affection, for people and things that went before. I know I'll often stop and think about them. In my life, I love you more

Obviously the best superpower.

There have been many lessons learned.

1. The importance of traditions.

2. How to be thankful for family and friends.

3. How to give back.

4. What the word "community" really means.

5. That it isn't about the destination, but the journey.

6. The consequences of making bad choices.

7. To trust people, until you have a reason not to.

8. To be welcoming and accepting of everyone.

9. How to be my own, individual person.

10. How to work for what I want.

11. How to be great at giving directions.

12. How to be humble.

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