Fact Is, Single People Are The Best At Giving Relationship Advice

Fact Is, Single People Are The Best At Giving Relationship Advice

You just can't write a romantic comedy without a single friend.

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If you have ever had a messy breakup, a clingy partner, or some other relationship issue, I cannot relate. I am extremely single. But for some reason, I have found that recently I've been in situations where I've been asked to give support and relationship advice to my friends. I've never been in a real or successful relationship, so it would actually make zero logical sense to ask me for relationship advice, yet that's exactly what I find myself giving — and, somehow, it works.

I've realized that I'm being helpful not in spite of my single lifestyle but because of it and that I was able to give meaningful support to my friends by reminding them of their value as an individual and being able to separate themselves from their relationship and their emotions. You are the only person who is a constant in your life, so you have to learn to trust yourself in order to form solid relationships with others, romantic or otherwise.

People who are in relationships, and especially my female friends, tend to fall into codependency that lacks autonomy or confidence in their own identity. One friend I had would call me about how depressed she was feeling about school and her grades, yet still was trying to repair a relationship with an emotionally detached boy who had no interest in her.

As I watch my friends navigate the weird dating world of Gen Z, I find it amazing how many couples don't actually like each other or can't differentiate between themselves. I told my friend that she should be making changes in her life to promote her own value and gain confidence in her own abilities. As a single person, I've never dealt with such a tied identity. I've had to purely be myself, trust my abilities, and bolster self-confidence. This means I have time to focus on my studies and my extracurriculars and have never waivered solely based on an interest in another person, for the most part.

I promise I'm not a robot! I have emotions and feelings! I still love a good cheesy romcom, and I pine for attractive men and the concept of a stable relationship. But I don't let the thoughts consume my every waking minute. You could say I'm putting my trust in the universe that I'll find my dude some day. But I had to first find myself, and I think everyone should do the same, even if they're currently dating someone.

I recommend that if you have a consistently single person in your life, you should ask them about your relationship issues. Letting in a new outside perspective is always a good idea. Of course, there are stable couples who have been able to strike that balance between individual and couple quite effectively, and they also give excellent advice. But I'd start with the single person. We're probably way easier to find in college, anyway.

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5 Musts For When You Stay At Your S.O.'s Dorm

Sleepovers are fun, must rules are a must.

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Spending the night with your significant other is one of the best parts about finally getting to college. You finally are given the freedom to sleep in the same bed all night and wake up in the morning to little kisses. Staying over at your significant other's place does come with many challenges of its own though. The slept in makeup, the lack of clothes for the next day, roommates, and overstayed welcomes all are realities of sleeping over at your significant others dorm.

Spending the night in college can be a difficult road to navigate and it's even more difficult when there are multiple roommates involved. No matter how many times you have likely spent the night with your significant other, you're sure to face some challenges of proper sleepover etiquette. These are a few of the rules of college sleepovers that should probably be followed in order to keep your significant other happy, roommates happy, and to get the most out of your sleepovers.

1. Their space is their space, as well as their roommates' 

Just like you wouldn't go to someone's house and take all of their stuff, you probably shouldn't do this in your significant other's dorm. Taking all of their food, or their roommates' food is not cool. Respect their space just like you would want them to respect yours.

2. Pack smart 

Spending the night with your significant other means loading up your contacts, solution, medication, clothes, pajamas, and the list goes on. Only pack the things that you'll actually need or else you'll be carrying around half of your room all day. And don't forget you can always borrow a comfy t-shirt from your significant other.

3. You still can say "no" if you don't want to do something 

Just because it is their room, you don't have to do anything that you don't want to. Know your own boundaries and be respectful of yourself, your significant other should always understand that.

4. Respect their roommates 

No, you cannot stay over at your significant other's dorm if their roommate says no. It is their room too and it's important to respect how they feel. Your best bet is to be kind and friendly to their roommate, and they'll probably let you stay over more often.

5. Know that you probably won't look like Beyoncé when you wake up 

No one wakes up with perfect hair and the full face of makeup. You should know that and know that your significant other will still love you when you wake up with your hair a mess and bad breath.

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