My Worst Experience With Online Dating
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relationships

My Worst Experience With Online Dating

To be blunt, it was terrible.

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My experience in a major online relationship began in high school as an escape from my own reality. I told myself I wasn't attractive, nor was I one of the cool kids in the clique. I turned my attention to the wonders of the internet, a place that has access to almost anything.

I figured dating someone online would make me feel better about myself and boost the self-esteem I lost growing up. This stemmed from obesity, anxiety, and of course, my Asperger's syndrome diagnosis. So, when I found a platform to communicate with others, I thought I had it made.

Looking back, my online dating experience is something I regret 100 percent.

I was only a junior in high school who couldn't wait to return home every day to use my computer. Because I was an obvious fanatic of the "Glee" series, I spent my days on its forum website, where I made a few friends, enemies, and basically spent hours on the chat communicating with everyone about the show or beyond.

But, I spent my time on the website developing romantic feelings for someone I didn't know. I was 16 when it was set in stone, but I knew this person since I was literally 14. We had a pretty good friendship at first. It became rocky once I let my bitter attitude and jealousy get in the way, but for some reason, we'd always reconcile.

I wasn't exactly in this person's league (at least that's what I assumed). On top of that, I lived in Philadelphia, and the person told me that they lived in Cleveland. In my head, I was like, "Oh, okay. That's not bad, it's only a 7-hour drive." But, the person only saw our relationship as strictly platonic, while dating others online in the process.

I didn't want to accept it— the jealousy was unhealthy. Back then, I didn't understand why I was so eager to confess my love for someone I didn't know face-to-face.

Let's jump to August of 2014. It was my final month before junior year and my free time, of course, remained online. During this time, "Glee" was in shambles after Cory Monteith's death, and the show was slowly coming to an end. For some reason, this person and I would have multiple conversations and grew closer.

Suddenly, it came about that the romantic feelings were mutual and things started from there. I realized that I got what I wanted, but I realized that the relationship wasn't what I wanted. I took a risk in agreeing to date this person after they revealed to me that they didn't live in Ohio but out of the country.

And still, my stupid ass still agreed to commit to the relationship.

I was so ecstatic to be in a relationship with someone I had feelings for years online. But, about a month in, things didn't go well. For one, time-zone issues. I'd be sleep when they'd be awake. If we were up at the same time, we'd only spend about 15 minutes chatting on Kik or on the forum.

I was taking 2 AP courses during junior year, and a lot of my attention drew away from the online world. They'd get angry if I couldn't get back to them on time. Sometimes, so would I.

We never talked on the phone, nor did we Skype as often. We knew we were both real people because we Skyped before, but it just didn't feel as genuine as I thought it would be.

Eventually, I started losing interest. We broke up by the end of that year.

I guess my point is that online dating is boring unless you find some lucky way to cope with online long-distance relationships. I, for damn sure, couldn't afford to take trips out of the country to cuddle up with someone for a day. Hell, I can't even afford college as is.

It was that experience that made me realize that I would never date online again. Sure, it was a big part of my adolescence, but I prefer the easy route.

If you're in an online relationship and managing it well, kudos to you.

But would I ever do it again? Hell, no.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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