Ah yes, it's that time of the year again. Spring, the smell of love is in the air. Did I say love? I meant basketball, the NCAA March Madness Tournament to be exact.
That means there will be bracket busters, money lost and most of all, very angry girlfriends! Now, ladies you have to understand that March is an emotional roller coaster for us, and we need your full support to help us through the tough times. This is why I present to you, the six ways to get through March without killing your boyfriend:
1. Get into the sport:
One of the easiest ways to deal with something is by understanding it. For example, I absolutely hate roller coasters; however, when my girlfriend forces me to take her to an amusement park, I’ll be expected to join her on at least one. Am I going to enjoy this? It’s possible; however, I can’t hate it until I try it. The same goes for sports. You may despise sports, but to your boyfriend, they mean the difference between life and death. Even if you just have to pretend that you like it, spending a few hours with him may be really great.
2. Be there when his team loses:
This is very important! Every year, we pretend that we know things about college sports, and we pick a winner based on what we hear from Dick Vitale, maybe that’s just me. And every year, our team gets knocked out of the tournament and we’re stuck sitting on a couch staring at a devastating final score. The feeling that is experienced rivals that of when a pet dies and it can put us into a two-hour depression. During this time of sorrow, we need you there to help us cope with our stress because we’ll be there for you.
3. Understand that we may ignore you:
This isn’t true all the time, but more often than not. If we’re sitting there and responding with “mhm's” and “sure, whatever you want” understand that it’s nothing personal, it’s just that Yale is beating Baylor and we’re excited. Also, when we take you out to dinner, we probably picked a restaurant with a large TV but this means absolutely nothing because we would still die for you if push came to shove, so just let us enjoy the game.
4. Know some facts:
MICHIGAN STATE LOST!
5. Tell us if you want to talk:
Although we love the games, you guys are our main priorities. If we really liked basketball more than we liked you, I promise that we wouldn’t be with y’all; however, this is not the case. You are more important than the fact that Kentucky is down four with two minutes left in the games, even though at the time it may seem like the world is crumbling in front of him. If you really need something, just shut the TV off and tell us what’s wrong; I assure you that we’ll only be mad for about an hour and then we’ll do whatever you need.
6. We don’t know anything:
The good thing about the NCAA tournament is that we will stop watching it once our brackets are destroyed. If your boyfriend is like most guys, he doesn’t know who’s going to win and after about three days of games, he won’t have a perfect bracket. Luckily for my girlfriend, I don’t know anything about basketball, so my bracket was imperfect after four games, which is about two hours so these rules don’t apply to us. All jokes aside, we also may not know what you’re feeling at the time if we’re caught up in a close game. This being said, communication is key in any relationship, so you need to tell us if something is wrong.
As I said before, you are our main priorities, but this tournament is very important to us as well. Just give us these few weeks to cry, yell at the TV and probably forget to shave and we will be back to our loving selves before you know if. I may not be a great counselor, but if these steps are followed, I’m sure your relationship will still be healthy in April.
So when you’re in the next room researching untraceable poisons, close the tabs and think about us; also, think about the times that you dragged us to the mall, to your mother’s house and to your best friend’s house (yeah we don’t like her). These are the steps to survive March Madness!
