Having a significant other is so much fun. They're your best friend, the person you confide in, and your lover all in one. Going to college when you are in a relationship can be super difficult, especially if you don't go to the same school as them. Here's what I wish I'd known before going off to college with a boyfriend:
1. Distance sucks.
If you're not going to the same college as your significant other, it makes it so much harder. I go to college a little over an hour away from my boyfriend and even that is rough. Going to college hours away from your S/O can definitely put a strain on your relationship.
2. Trust is essential.
Trust is key in any kind of relationship. It is super important in college relationships. Think about all the relationships you've heard ended in college because there was no trust. So many of my friends have broken up with their boyfriends because he's snapping or texting other girls.
3. Cute texts and snaps will keep things spontaneous.
Sending cute texts and snaps will boost each others' moods overall. It's a nice friendly reminder that you're thinking of them. Of course, keep it PG, you never know when the other will be in class or in public.
4. Effective communication will keep your relationship alive.
Texts and calls will be your #1 way of communication. I am super grateful that my boyfriend and I learned how to communicate well over phone calls. Without that skill, we probably wouldn't be together.
5. FaceTime and video chatting is ten times better than texts and calls, if possible.
In this day and age, there is no reason to not video chat or FaceTime! This is 10x better than just a phone call. Being able to see your bf/gf and see their reactions makes a world of difference.
6. Independence is important.
For me, not depending on my boyfriend was hard. We used to do everything together and at college, I have to be independent and do things on my own. Preparing yourself for this will leave you less in shock when the time comes.
7. Frequent visits aren't always an option.
I wanted my boyfriend to visit every weekend but that's a very high expectation. Even though he would like to visit every weekend, it's super hard for him. It eats up gas, money, and his time. It's even harder if you live hours away. Don't expect visits all the time and be understanding when they say they can't visit.
8. Having a change of clothes for him at school is essential.
Keeping a change of clothes for them will make their life easier. I keep a toothbrush, undies, shorts, shirt, and even a sweater for my boyfriend. You never know when they'll spill something on their clothes or even stay an extra night.
9. Planning is everything.
Plan dates you will see each other. It's super hard to travel to each other last minute, especially if you live far away. Not only plan that date you'll see them, but plan what you'll do. Knowing what you're going to do, makes you even more excited for that day. It also helps you plan outfits accordingly.
10. Drama is avoidable.
Don't get upset if you don't get a "good morning" text or a "goodnight text" every single day. This is one of the busiest times of your lives. You never know when they woke up late or just fell asleep. They most likely are not ignoring you. You don't need to stress about the small things. This will just create added drama
11. Talking things out is the only way to fix fights.
In any relationship, there will be fights of some kind. Having distance between you both will make it hard to resolve them. Learning how to talk things out on the phone will be super beneficial when fights come. Don't be that person who ghosts their significant other when they're mad, it will just make it worse. Instead, talk it out like adults and learn to listen to what the other person has to say.
12. Time management should become a priority.
Whether you're in a relationship or not, balance is so important in college. If you have good time management, balance should be easy. Like balancing classes and fun time, learn to balance your relationship. Make sure one person isn't putting in all the work.
13. Communication is good, but there IS such thing as too much.
Staying in touch with your boo is good, but don't constantly blow their phone up. Just because you may not see them as often as you would like, doesn't mean it's fine to constantly text them.
14. Avoid bothering them during class by knowing each other's schedules.
Knowing each other's schedule is super helpful in college. College keeps you busy and your schedule often varies day-to-day. You don't want your bf/gf calling you in the middle of class.
15. Jealously may happen.
When you're going to different schools or even the same school, you'll make new friends. Sometimes it's hard to think of your significant other making new friends and experiences without you. Learn to accept the fact that college is full of new experiences and it's totally fine to have different ones from your significant other.
16. Don't let the stress of college get the best of you.
Take it from me, being in college with a relationship is hard. You're already stressed with class, work, extracurricular activities, and having a relationship on top of all that can be super stressful. Make sure to make time for your person and make sure they always feel loved.
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