15 Twenty-Somethings On How The Pandemic Is Affecting Their Love Lives
Swoon

I Asked 15 Twenty-Somethings How The Pandemic Is Affecting Their Love Lives, And The Responses May Surprise You

Quarantining is nothing like a "stay-cation."

1273
I Asked 15 Twenty-Somethings How The Pandemic Is Affecting Their Love Lives, And The Responses May Surprise You

It goes without saying a majority of the public is fantasizing about the day our world will achieve some sort of normalcy. People have lost their lives, their jobs, and even their relationships. Couples like Armie Hanner and Elizabeth Chambers, Kacey Musgraves and Ruston Kelly, and Lili Reinhart and Cole Sprouse have all called it quits during the past few months further emphasizing that love is just another thing the coronavirus is taking a toll on.

We already know the dating game post-COVID is going to change. FaceTime dates have picked up steam during these months in quarantine, and masks may be the chosen accessory over earrings and favored over the perfect shade of lipstick. But what about the twenty-somethings who started quarantine with a significant other? How have their relationships been affected during the past few months? As usual, I turned to social media, asking my fellow twenty-somethings in search of an answer. Did they break up, get closer than ever, or possibly spend the past few months alone? Here's what they had to say.

1. "Corona affected my relationship quite a bit in the first months, we had to postpone a few celebrations and even had a few arguments when we were together." - Joy, 23

Here is the full response:

"Corona affected my relationship quite a bit in the first months, we had to postpone a few celebrations and even had a few arguments when we were together - in my defense, he was the one wanting to go everywhere during quarantine, making me worry a lot. We never had an argument before the pandemic, so this was definitely a shock in our relationship. I wonder how many couples broke up because of silly arguments during these days."

Joy brings up a really good point, prior to quarantine, she and her boyfriend rarely fought. She also mentioned her boyfriend wanted to go places, which she didn't agree with, this can be a polarizing concept, just like politics. Tempers can fly high while in isolation, something which may have been the cause of some breakups mentioned above.

2. "What romantic life?" - Lauren, 28

Honestly, same girl. I can only imagine how hard it is to actually start a relationship during a pandemic. There is a certain amount of fear associated with going out now and it hard to push that anxiety away while on a date. And what about seeing other people? Safety wise, it is a good idea to discuss these elements of a relationship, but that could lead to an awkward conversation early into dating.

3. "I got a boyfriend during quarantine." - Tiffany, 22

OK, I guess love in the time of COVID does exist. When asked for more details, my friend said this

"We met right before quarantine started, at the beginning of March. We just talked on the phone until like the end of May. Then we decided to see each other again and now we are dating."

4. "It's dead" - Alex, 29

"I wasn't seeing anyone before the shutdown. It's not like I can go out and meet someone either right now. But I just started a new job, so I'm probably too busy to have a romantic life anyway. However, the quarantine was just the final nail."

5. "I moved in with my boyfriend three days before a shelter in place was put into effect and I had to start working from home. I hadn't even unpacked my belongings, and I was now in 'his' house all day every day." - Melissa, 29

Here is more of what Melissa* had to say:

"This was a fantastic opportunity for us to learn each other's boundaries, establish our 'us time,' and our respective 'me time.' I'm thankful that we learned really quickly how to make us work, and being in the house all the time really expedited my transition from 'his' house to 'our home.'"

I think Melissa* makes an excellent point about using this time in quarantine to her and her boyfriend's advantage. Instead of seeing themselves as "stuck" in a house together, they learned more about one another, making these new discoveries work in their favor.

6. "I'm single and I'm sad." - Alyssa, 23

Honestly, we have all been there and you are not alone. So many women right now find themselves in the same position as you. But you deserve more than a man who is limited to FaceTime dates.

7. "I low-key want to kill my husband half the time" - Rachel, 22

I'm not going to lie, when I saw my friend's response, I burst out laughing. My friend, who got married last December, is supposed to be enjoying the "honeymoon part of her marriage. This is the part where everything is new and exciting. They shouldn't be locked in a house and feeling overwhelmed with the challenges this pandemic is bringing like unemployment or health-related scares.

8. "I'm alone because I'm not meeting up with anyone because of COVID." - Beth, 22

While FaceTime and virtual dates are gaining popularity, there is something to be said about physically meeting up with a person. It's great that virtual dates focus of communication, which helps people figure out if there is actual chemistry. However, there is something to be said about meeting a person and getting a physical sense for who the person is.

9. "I met this girl, but can't have dinner with her because of COVID." - Daniel, 27

I completely understand it can be frustrating to not physically be with a person during this time, there is a thing to be said for people who are choosing to be careful during this time.

10. "I've asked a few female friends to coffee, nothing major. I've realized I don't know what I want out of a relationship." - Dylan, 25

One of my male friends shared this with me, and frankly, I couldn't agree more. If anything, we are learning what we don't want in a relationship, and while this may not be the best of times, it is a good time to figure out what we hope for in the future.

"Honestly, I am considering taking a pause on dating because it's already such a weird time for it, but it's a weird time for everything. I kind of wish more people were also open to FaceTime dating." - Liza, 25

After a few matches on dating apps, my friend got a message which she shared with me and seen below.

"One guy made a rant three screenshots long on COVID being a hoax. If you choose to go out and screw COVID, that's your prerogative, but I don't think any first-time conversation should be three screenshots long."

Same girl! if people feel comfortable going out that is fine. But in regard to a relationship, it is important to have some sort of understanding, especially in regard to something serious like this pandemic.

12. "Long story short, we quarantined in our own homes and the separation took away all physical aspects of our relationship. It made me realize how poor our communication was, and it allowed me to gain the strength I needed to end the relationship." - Sara

Read her full response below:

"I was trying to make a very toxic relationship of a combined five years work. We didn't live together at the time and when the pandemic hit, I begged him to quarantine with me. I lived with my grandmother who has COPD, and he lived with his mom who has lupus. Long story short, we quarantined in our own homes and the separation took away all physical aspects of our relationship. It made me realize how poor our communication was, and it allowed me to gain the strength I needed to end the relationship. I spent so much time waiting on him for things that I wanted to move forward in life. I was finally able to just do it all on my own! I packed my life up and moved to Colorado from Florida, and have never felt more free or happy. I spent so much time trying to teach someone how to make me happy and love me in the way that I needed.... when all I really needed to do was make myself happy. As horrible as this virus has been, I can't help but feel blessed for the pause it has given me in my life and the ability to re-evaluate and make those changes."

Reading my friend's response was really powerful. While this pandemic has changed so many lives, she used it to finally give her the push to change her life. Because may people have lost the physical elements of their relationship, it is making us reconsider why we are in certain relationships. Is it the person or the sex? If there is one part of her message which stands out, don't wait for someone to love you, because you are worthy. Don't try to change someone into the person you want them to be. Instead, be the person you want to be.

13. "I haven't been about to get out of the 'talking' phase with anyone." - Isabel, 22

While there is something excited about the "talking phase," it can be frustrating to feel as though you are stuck in this part of the "relationship." However, it is kind of hard to do anything but during this time. Here is more on what my friend had to say:

"I don't feel comfortable meeting these guys out in public. I just don't want to take the risk with my health. Yeah, the guys get it but you can tell it kind of darkens the mood when I say I'm not comfortable meeting them. One guy just didn't seem to think my fear was justified. That was a clear sign we weren't compatible. If he couldn't get my fear, he wasn't worth my time."

14. "We both believe the pandemic helped our communication skills. Also, we've had a lot of sex. He's definitely more involved in my day-to-day life than before, but it just means he's now super supportive." - Lola, 23

How cute is this? While this friend and her boyfriend were living together pre-pandemic, I think there is something to be said for the support they provide each other. My friend also shared her boyfriend surprised her with takeout and a gift after she passed her certification course. I think it is also important to note communication is key in any relationship, whether you live together, or not.

15. "My boyfriend and I did long distance for years. Now we are quarantining together and I love it." - Bethany, 24

Reading these messages helped me believe love during this time is not dead, and some couples are thriving!

season 2 netflix GIF by Gilmore Girls Giphy

Relationships are hard and require work. Why should we believe this work gets easier during a global pandemic? It's not like outside forces play a lesser role, nor is this quarantine like a "stay-cation." It would be naive to think that. All one can hope is our loved ones remain healthy and stay optimistic that our dating world will one day have some sort of resemblance to what it was before the coronavirus turned it upside down.

Note: Names* have been changed for the safety and anonymity of the responders.


Follow Swoon on Instagram.

From Your Site Articles
Report this Content
Swoon

119 People Reveal How The Pandemic Has Affected Their Love Lives, And Honestly... Relatable

"I haven't been able to get out of the 'talking phase' with anyone."

The reality is, there's no part of life the pandemic hasn't affected. Whether it's your work life, your home life, your social life, or your love life, coronavirus (COVID-19) is wreaking havoc on just about everything — not to mention people's health.

When it comes to romance, in particular, people are all handling things differently and there's no "right way" of making it through, regardless of your relationship status (single, taken, married, divorced, you name it). So, some of Swoon's creators sought out to hear from various individuals on how exactly their love lives have been affected since quarantine began.

Keep Reading... Show less
Entertainment

7 Things You Need To Know About Our NEW Bachelorette, Tayshia Adams

Could THIS be the most dramatic season in "Bachelorette" history?

Bombshell news coming from Bachelor Nation today, Tayshia Adams is replacing Clare Crawley as the bachelorette!

Rumor has it that Clare found her person early on in the process and did not want to continue with the process of leading other men on throughout the season.

Keep Reading... Show less

The NBA is back, and for basketball fans, like myself, it has been the BEST news we have heard since COVID-19 shutdown play indefinitely. I mean, come on, we need to see if James Harden can once again perform so well he has back-to-back 50 point games, Kawhi can lead another team to the championship title, and whether Giannis is going to be back-to-back MVP... among like 500 other things running through our heads!

In the midst of all of the amazing statistics and records that these players are breaking, though, we also just love the NBA because well, there are some pretty good looking guys out there. Here are the 19 hottest NBA players (in no particular order) you would totally let slam dunk on you now that the NBA has returned.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

Everything You Need To Know About Macronutrients, Because A Diet Should Be More Than Calories

Pay attention to what you're eating, not just how much you're eating.

Plenty of people are familiar with the "calories in, calories out" (CICO) method of dieting which can be used for losing, gaining, or maintaining weight. This method relies on calculating a person's total daily energy expenditure (TDEE) to ensure that they are not overeating or undereating to achieve their desired weight. TDEE considers a person's height, weight, age, gender, and level of activity to determine what their caloric intake should be — some calculators can factor in body fat percentage as well. When I used a TDEE calculator online, it said that my TDEE would be 1,990 calories if I was trying to maintain my weight, but are all calories created equal? I'd argue that they're not.

It might seem obvious to some of you that 1,990 calories of macaroni and cheese are not healthy at all compared to 1,990 calories of varied foods (fruit, veggies, meat, bread, etc.).

Keep Reading... Show less
Swoon

Just Because You're Asked To Be In A Wedding, Doesn't Always Mean You Should Say Yes

If you can't invest time, money, and YOURSELF, maybe say no to the offer for the bride's sake!

Being in a wedding is a really big commitment. I personally think if you've never been in one before, you don't understand the time, money, and energy that goes into being a part of it.

Keep Reading... Show less

- Though as a little girl, I had the silkiest, softest hair that would get compliments everywhere I went, since I turned about thirteen I've since had coarse, dry hair no amount of deep conditioning masks or sulfate-free shampoo could fix.

- I started using the Raincry's Condition Boar Bristle Brush several months ago, and while I noticed that my hair had been softer, silkier, and shinier than it had ever been, I didn't make the connection because I never thought a simple hairbrush could make any difference in my hair texture.

- I will be the first to admit that I thought it was ridiculous to spend nearly a hundred dollars on a hairbrush, but this one eliminates the need for me to use any heat tools or styling products on it.

- I put some oil or a serum in my hair when it's wet, brush my hair with the boar bristle brush once it's dry, and end up with the lowest maintenance, shiniest hair I've had since I was 8 years old.

@raincrybeauty

Keep Reading... Show less
YouTube

Bingeing a romantic comedy is always a good idea, and during this pandemic, these movies bring us one of the only elements of romance we can get. Through all the break-ups, obstacles, and struggles in our love lives, romantic comedies have always been there to make us laugh and keep us company while we cry.

While we love these movies for the beyond gorgeous male love interests, the female protagonists are still the ones we always remember. Although rom-coms are far from reality, it is always fun to imagine what our life would be like if a cinematic studio was behind our love life. So what does your favorite romantic comedies say about your dream guy?

Keep Reading... Show less

Whether you're in an unhealthy relationship currently, you know someone who is, or you just want to have these numbers saved just in case it could one day save someone's life (if not your own), this article is for you. Here are three numbers to save in your contacts ASAP so you can always be safe, both physically and mentally, in every relationship.

Keep Reading... Show less

As any poor college student, a little kick of caffeine for less than a dollar has always sounded great to me. So, naturally, AriZona Iced Tea has been a go-to for as long as I can remember.

Keep Reading... Show less
Politics and Activism

Dear Closeted Latina,

You were never alone.

Remember how the Latin world got rocked when Ricky Martin came out?

Keep Reading... Show less

If you're anything like me, you're probably anxious about going back to college. The uncertainty of nearly everything is stressful and makes it difficult to prepare for going back to campus. Take it one step at a time and remain calm! If nothing else, take a look at this list of six essentials for living on campus during the COVID-19 pandemic! You got this!

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments