22 Outdated Wedding Trends To Avoid At All Costs
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22 Outdated Wedding Trends To Avoid At All Costs When It's Your Turn To Tie The Knot

Stand your ground about what you want to happen for that day, work with your partner, and don't worry about pleasing everyone else in that sense.

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22 Outdated Wedding Trends To Avoid At All Costs When It's Your Turn To Tie The Knot

The next big step in your relationship with your partner is finally happening. Now engaged, it's time to start planning for your big day together. Yet suddenly you realize that although you have been dreaming of this day for a long time, you have no actual idea of what you want for it. This is where you have to be strong. Sure, ask for ideas and help, but know when to draw the line about what you do and don't want.

There is nothing wrong with refusing to uphold old traditions that have no place in the modern day.

Ginormous Cakes.

During my idea-gathering for my wedding, I asked friends and family about some of the negative or non-memorable things about previous weddings they had attended. This proved to be a question that sparked passionate answers, the number one of which was that "traditional" wedding cakes are disgusting and a huge waste of money.

Let's put this into a little perspective, the cake depicted below this costs at BARE MINIMUM $2500. No matter what flavor it is on the inside the outside of the cake is smothered in unappetizing fondant icing which is basically the clay of the baking world. Fondant is good for making elaborate designs and shapes, but it is not tasty. The icing is overly sugary, usually dense if not hard, and gets scraped off to the side of the plate. Traditional wedding cake flavors are usually generic and unmemorable.

So you're paying thousands of dollars for a cake that very few of your guests actually want to eat, and most of it will go to waste because you'll take the leftovers home, claiming you're going to finish it, and then it goes dry and unpalatable in the refrigerator. The cake is even more likely to go uneaten if you go on your honeymoon right away and clearly can't take it with you.

So why not instead, buy a small and simply decorated cake (that you actually want to eat) so you and your partner have something to cut, and then have a variety of other desserts for your guests to choose from. Not everyone likes cake all that much, so why not offer some mini pies, chocolate dipped fruit, mousse shooters, cookies, etc. Don't waste that kind of money on a towering cake!

Tuxedos.

In 2018 it costs as much to rent a tuxedo as it does to buy a nice suit. Tuxedos are sharp looking for certain occasions but are outdated at this point. A formal tuxedo has so many pieces to it, and cummerbunds, in particular, are visually strange. Cummerbunds are the horizontally pleated piece of fabric, worn around the waist with a tux. Instead spend that money on getting your partner a nice suit that can be worn to other formal occasions, and be tailored to fit perfectly. This implies that your partner even wants to wear a suit though.

Boho Chic or Barn Weddings.

If you did not grow up in a barn or have some sort of significant tie to barns, why on earth would you do this? Hosting a wedding in a barn is not really chic, and is usually dusty or dirty. That does not mean it can't be made to be a beautiful experience, it's just a lot more work than it looks.

As for the Boho-inspired look, it's a similar premise. If it isn't your usual aesthetic, why fake it? Just because it can look incredible on Pinterest, does not mean you have the time, funds, and people-power it takes to emulate those looks. You may be getting in over your head if you think you can pull off a Pinterest perfect wedding on a budget.

Deep Cleavage And Sheer Dresses.

I'm going to be blunt—your family is watching! The wedding dress is not the outfit and the wedding itself is not the time to tantalize your partner. Have some class and spare your family and friends the view. This doesn't mean you should cover up completely by any means! But is it really appropriate to look like you're walking around naked on your wedding day?

This sheer and deep cleavage trend has been on the incline the last couple years, but it's dropping off quickly. Remember that you're spending, on average, a grand or more on a dress and then at least as much on a photographer to capture that big day for you to look back on for years to come. Are you really going to fall victim to pop-up trends that won't pass the test of time?

Of course, this is ultimately up to you but sit on these thoughts for a while before you do decide to show all of your loved ones 100% of your cleavage. Of course, you want to look good, and you can do so without revealing everything. Surprise your partner with a saucy outfit later, when you're alone together.

Rose Gold.

It was trending, but that didn't keep it from looking basic. Many wedding photographers I read interviews about and even ones I talked to in person discussed how difficult it was to keep blush and rose gold colors from washing out of the photos. This issue can be more severe depending on the lighting of the venue. Rose gold may not be a strong color option by itself but it could make a great accent color in the varied palette.

Flower Crowns.

This is something you wear at a renaissance fair, music festival, or playing dress-up as a kid. There is a fine line between soft flower accents to your bridal hairdo and totally overshadowing your look with a kiddie crown. Floral circlets are even stranger if you try to pull them off at any time of the year other than summer.

Huge Bridal Parties.

Learning to say no is difficult, especially if you haven't figured it out before you start planning your special day. It's great that you have a lot of friends but they don't all need to be involved in the bridal party. Honestly, many bridesmaids and even groomsmen complain about being part of the wedding party. Plus the more people involved in the wedding party the more voices there are to spout and press ideas and opinions on you. Coordinating outfits and plans becomes near impossible the more people you add to the list. Your friends will be glad that they don't have to spend so much time helping, and hundreds of dollars on outfits and gatherings.

Overlarge Bouquets. 

How much did you spend on your dress? A grand at least? Oh, let's cover up a large portion of your dream gown with flowers for one of the most anticipated moments of your life, yeah? Flowers are expensive, and depending on when you have your big day during the year the cost can triple or more for certain flowers. Don't hide your dress behind a bushel of shrubbery! If you make your bouquet out of live flowers, they're just going to die anyway. They may not even make it to the end of your ceremony, and during your vows, they're usually passed off to your maid or matron of honor. Is it really worth it?

Faux Calligraphy.

Unless you are a calligrapher by trade or hobby or know someone who is, the lettering can easily look like lazy cursive or just cheap. Etsy is a host to many artists who offer more than reasonable prices for doing the calligraphy on invitations, signs, and more. Pinterest may make it seem like it is cheaper to do it yourself, but that isn't always the case. Cheaper versus better. It's worth the small amount of money to make your documents and signs look good.

Casual Shoes.

Nothing says "I'm ready to be serious and commit to my partner" and "I've spent months of planning and thousands of dollars to make this day perfect" like not bothering to wear decent shoes. (Can you feel the sarcasm?) Come on! This isn't just a major fashion faux pas, it's downright disrespectful. Show your partner you can clean up well by putting 100% into your outfit. This trend isn't cute, it's awkward. Shoes for the wedding don't have to be expensive, so why waste money and effort on shoes that don't make you look sharp as a tack? You can choose shoes that you can wear again. At the very least, it's one day of looking your best.

Pointless And Unflattering Photos.

This is such a big offender that I'm giving you two examples. First off, no dress looks flattering hanging loose. When someone asks you what your wedding dress looks like, you show them a photo of either you or a model in the dress. As for the second photo, what were they thinking?! No one looks great upside down. It's bizarre! Anyway, you have limited time during your wedding and you want to make sure you remember the majority of it. Talk to your photographer ahead of time, know what photos you want, and don't screw around or waste time on garbage photos. You know which photos you'll show people and use. Don't lie to yourself and say it's actually really unique and cute.

Cheesy And Cliche Signs.

This is not just the "Happily Ever After This Way!" sign—this includes cliche activities like naming your drinks after yourselves. It is not cheesy-in-a-good-way, it's awkward. Chalkboards have gone out of style, and the lettering on them tends to look crappy anyway. Instead of using decorations that detract from the aesthetic, have a family quote elegantly framed to tie in with the theme of unity. Maybe just skip it all together. There's a chance you find that it looks significantly better without any sort of sign. Don't allow it to look like an afterthought.

Not Splitting the Bill.

We are LONG past the days where dowries are normal. Both families, as well as both partners, splitting the bill amongst the group has been the trend for at least a decade if not more. It's difficult to track when it started shifting over, but pinpointing the date it did is not the point. Welcome your new unified families by helping pay for the big day.

Cumbersome and Thoughtless Favors.

Very few weddings have a guest list free of any out-of-town family members or friends. Don't give out cacti to people who have to get on a plane! What on earth are they going to do with it? It may be considered a weapon with how fussy TSA is these days. It may be easier to buy something like that in bulk but it's not sweet, it's a burden. It's nicer to buy something smaller, that is meaningful to you as a couple to give out. Again Pinterest is brimming with ideas, but not all of them are good.

 Lazy Catering.

You have invited guests from all over to come to your big day, and you're going to serve them plain-old spaghetti. I love spaghetti, but this has been extremely overdone at weddings. Let's take a moment to remember that although catering is expensive, you're also eating what you order for the event. You know if you're making a cop-out choice. Food trucks for catering were a weird fad, and have fallen upon the wayside. (Thank goodness!) Weddings are a mix of formal and informal etiquette, that does not mean that informal is the same as casual.

This type of catering usually gives off the vibe that you either ran out of money, did not prioritize the meal you and your guests were going to sit through, or thought that it would not be an issue to have your guests (which usually includes even a few children) eat with their hands. This is just a bad idea all around.

Copycat Weddings.

Whose wedding is it? Oh, it's your wedding? Then don't make guests feel as though the are witnessing a role play of someone else's wedding. Of course, it's fun and helpful to take inspiration from other people's weddings, but make sure at the end of the day it's about you and your partner. You don't live to emulate others. Do you.

Gaudy Engagement Rings.

Are you going to wear your engagement ring after you get hitched? No? Then why bother with an expensive engagement ring or a wedding band on top of that. Consider having just one ring for both occasions. There are also stacking ring styles, though be warned they can look odd as separate pieces. Or just have a small band tattooed around your ring finger, under where your engagement ring sits. I know a tattoo is permanent, but hopefully, you're getting married with permanence in mind. (Things can change for sure, but you shouldn't get married with an exit plan ready).

Or incorporate your engagement ring into your wardrobe by wearing it for date nights or special events. At least don't let it collect dust in a jewelry box if you spent a lot of money on it. On another note, make sure you really like the ring you do pick. Don't just select the newest, flashiest trending style. You're, hopefully, going to wear this for the rest of your life. This isn't a competition on who gets a bigger rock. Show off your sense of style instead.

Two Dresses.

If you are considering buying a different dress just to wear at your reception, you may just need a splash of cold water to the face. What the hell are you spending all the money on your wedding dress for, if you don't even wear it for the entire day?! If you and your partner are intense and skilled dancers, it may be restricting, but are you positive you'll even have the energy to dance?

The events of the day are going to be emotionally and physically draining. If you feel so restricted in the wedding dress you are considering, why are you even debating buying it? Don't spend the whole day uncomfortable. Don't waste your money.

White Shoes.

Do you wear white shoes regularly? If so, wonderful! Feel free to spend a hundred dollars or more on a pair of shoes you'll wear more than once. Oh, you don't wear white shoes often… Probably because they are so quick to get filthy and destroyed. It's your money, but why not use that money to spoil yourself with a pair of shoes you have really wanted and will wear over and over again.

With most wedding dresses, the shoes won't be visible unless you pick up the dress to reveal them. So what's wrong with wearing a pair of heels that match your color scheme? It's a whole different story if you are wearing a dress that will show your shoes the whole time though.

Sequins and Cheap Beading.

Does it look like a prom dress, like the ones pictured below? Reconsider. Don't wear cheap looking clothes on your wedding day! This is your time to shine! Getting married on a budget is normal and manageable, and your outfit should be a priority. Don't compromise on this. Your dress, suit, or whatever you want to wear on your big day is going to be immortalized in photos and your memories as well as the guests'.

Anything Deprecating Or Condescending.

Wedding websites usually have "About Us" and "Our Story" sections. You may be funny people, but it is extremely difficult to write humor. It usually does not translate well, especially for those inexperienced in writing humor. This is not the appropriate avenue or hour to tell jokes, or even light-heartedly make fun of yourself or your partner. This is a celebration of joy, love, and togetherness. So don't ruin it by making jabs at your partner for everyone to read. Even stereotypical photos get uncomfortable: like the wife dragging the husband to the altar sort of stuff. It's degrading. Your guests can appreciate your humor in person. Weddings get stressful but don't make yourself look like an ass.

 Pity Invites.

Don't let parents or anyone bully you into inviting every person they've ever known or met. Weddings are expensive and emotionally charged, intimate events. Your neighbors don't need to witness it. Focus on your family and closest friends. Book a venue that heavily limits the guest count if you have to. Stand by your decision on who you want at your wedding. It's about your union with your partner, not showing off to everyone else.

Planning your big day can be hectic, stressful, and worrisome. But it doesn't have to be. Stand your ground about what you want to happen for that day, work with your partner, and don't worry about pleasing everyone else in that sense. Take a deep breath and remember that you've got this! Especially now that you know what not to do.

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