I've Never Been In A Relationship, But These 10 Things Remind Me That Love Exists

I've Never Been In A Relationship, But These 10 Things Remind Me That Love Exists

I just have a feeling.


I'm 19 and I've never been in a relationship, which makes me lose faith sometimes.

Sometimes it's hard to believe in love when you aren't experiencing it in a conventional way. In "Love Actually," Hugh Grant says, "If you look for it, I've got a sneaky feeling you'll find that love actually is all around."

I've made it a point to believe in that, so I look for it.

1. My parents

Lovianna Blackwell

I know how lucky I am that my parents are still together and I'll never take it for granted. Their love story is one of my favorites and whenever I start to feel like love isn't real, I remember that every day I've been alive, and sometime before that, my parents loved each other. Because of that, I have no doubts.

2. My best friend

Lovianna Blackwell

One time someone asked me what I thought love was if I've never been in a relationship, and I told them I'd just know. And I know that because I have love for my best friend.

To me, love is a feeling and an action and a choice. It has little to do with romance and a lot to do with trust. That's the way I see my best friend. I trust her with everything in me. I choose to tell her things I don't tell anyone else. I think she's absolutely perfect and I feel lucky to have her in my life.

3. Flowers


Flowers are easily my favorite thing in the whole world. There is nothing more beautiful to me than a field of wild and independent daisies, or a lonely rose that seems to have its guard up. And I choose to believe that God put them all here for the sole purpose of giving them to the people you love.

4. Taylor Swift songs


A lot of songs give me faith in love. Music is the most powerful thing we have. And I know it's a bit of a stretch, but I feel like Taylor Swift kind of raised me.

From 6 to 19, her songs have been teaching me lessons of heartbreak, life, love, and all the little things in between. That really helps develop a person when you focus on it as much as I have.

It's great to have a reminder that love can find you and leave you and grow with you despite obstacles like the ones she writes about. I've spent a huge chunk of my life trying to be headstrong like Taylor Swift with the hopes that I can believe in love as she does.

5. Cheesecake


I know it's weird for me to say cheesecake is a reminder that love exists, but I'll own it. Here's why: cheesecake is so simple that you know when a cheesecake is really memorable, it had to have been made with love.

Four ingredients can't really shine on their own, but with some heart, they do.

6. Reese Witherspoon


Like with music, movies have a way of helping us feel what we don't have or can't see. But specifically, Reese Witherspoon movies take it a step further for me.

My two favorite movies are "Legally Blonde" and "Sweet Home Alabama" because I see myself in them. That makes love feel all the more obtainable.

Her characters in both movies worked ridiculously hard to overcome obstacles to reach success, and then they just happen to find love along the way. That's always been the way I hope love finds me. I put my career and personal goals at the top of my priorities with the idea that love will find its way in.

7. Smiles


Smiles are heartwarming. It's the easiest thing to do, but there's so much meaning behind a genuine smile.

It's a symbol that someone is enjoying life and they want to give that joy to someone else. It's proof every single day that people are happy, maybe even in love. They're in love with something. Maybe they're like me and they're only in love with their best friend and daisies, but that's something they smile for and I think that's really cool.

8. The ocean


There is one inanimate thing that is a perfect reflection of everything I perceive love to be. That is the ocean.

It's continuous and infinite. It controls part of the universe. Not all of it has been discovered and couldn't possibly be. It's kind of scary, but in a beautiful and mysterious way that is intriguing. It's deep and it's ever-changing. It'll move you and toss you around.

9. Writing

Writing and words are in the same area of my brain as love because it brings so many people together. It's the way we express ourselves.

I've let writing take me over in a way that I hope love one day can. I want to love the way I write: meticulously. With writing, and with love, we get a choice to say the right thing and make things how we want them.

10. Heartbreak


I suppose you can't be heartbroken without being in love, and my heart has been broken. I never had a full relationship with the guy who broke my heart, but I'm sure I was in love with him. Or an idea I had of who he was. It's the worst reminder that love is out there, but a reminder nonetheless.

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To My Boyfriend's Ex

I just had to get this off my chest.


The thing about living in a fairly small town, the same one where my boyfriend and you, his ex live, is that I'm bound to run into you. Beyond that, even if it weren't for him, we already run in the same circles. I'm sure you think I hate you or that I can't stand you.

That couldn't be further from the truth, though. Let me tell you how I feel about you because I want to get this off my chest and also clear the air for you.

Honestly, I'm a little bit jealous of you. When I look at you, I can see what he saw (and still sees in you). You're beautiful, you have a bubbly personality, you're driven, and you're fun to be around. You also like a lot of the things he likes. I've come to know this because I do too.

So in turn, that means you and I have these things in common. So yeah, at first I was really jealous of you. You seem great. I truly mean it.

I'm thankful for you. If it weren't for his experiences with you, he wouldn't be the same person he is today. And I don't mean that in a snarky, "thanks for screwing up" way. I genuinely mean it in the most sincere way. I'm so glad he was able to go through ups and downs with you and have the times with you that he did. I hope you still cherish some of those times as he does.

That's another thing, I can tell you're great from the way he's talked about you. At first, I wondered if him speaking so highly of you was a sign he didn't care for me and didn't want to be with me.

But I now realize that it's truly just that he values the time you two spent together even though it didn't work out. I have a large amount of respect for you, and I respect the fact that he doesn't feel the need to resort to "put you down" in order to make me feel better. That's not what we're here for. There's no need for that.

Also, I'm sorry. I'll be completely honest: I'm happy things have worked out for him and me, but I am sorry to you because that means they didn't for you, and if I understand correctly, you really wanted them to. With where he and I are at now, I can't imagine the pain of losing him. So if it was anywhere near as painful for you as I imagine it would be for me, I'm sorry.

I don't expect you to want to be friends. I don't expect you to like me. I don't expect any of that.

I just hope you know I carry no ill feelings around toward you because of him. Honestly, the feelings I have toward you regarding him, are positive.

So, thank you. Maybe this whole "living in a small town and running into your boyfriend's ex" thing isn't all that bad.

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Top Lang Leav Quotes For The Girl In Love

"Who you love and who loves you back determines so much in your life."


One of my favorite modern poets is Lang Leav because she captures love and loss in a way that's both easy to read but also powerful. Some of her poems seem simple, but they hold such deep meaning when it comes to love, heartbreak and finding yourself. I'm not going to lie to ya'll, some of her heartbreak poems hit pretty hard. But, this isn't about heartbreak, this is about the beautiful feeling we call love.

Here are some of my favorite quotes by Lang Leav about love:

"It's so dark right now, I can't see any light around me.

That's because the light is coming from you. You can't see it but everyone else can."
Love & Misadventure

"You were you,
and I was I;
we were two
before our time.

I was yours
before I knew,
and you have always
been mine too."
Love & Misadventure

"I had my first dream about you last night.
Really? She smiles. What was it about?
I don't remember exactly but the whole time I was dreaming, I knew you were mine."
Love & Misadventure

"I love you, I do -
you have my word.

You have all my words."

"Souls do not have calendars or clocks, nor do they understand the notion of time or distance. They only know it feels right to be with one another."
Love & Misadventure

"It was a quiet love, a tacit love. It came without prelude or preamble. We never said the word love–we didn't have to. It was in our laughter, in the sense of wonder we found in each other. And if we had doubts then, time has told us otherwise."
The Universe of Us

"How much love is a person capable of giving? I thought I knew the answer until I met you."
Sea of Strangers

"When love finds you, it doesn't come as crashing waves or thunderbolts. It appears as a song on the radio or a particular blue in the sky. It dawns on you slowly, like a warm winter sunrise—where the promise of summer shines out from within."

Be still, my heart.

Whether you're falling in love or already madly in love, these quotes are sure to hit your heartstrings. Not to mention, they make pretty good Instagram captions for all your sappy love pictures!

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