Hello, I’m Emily.I’m currently 18 years old and a college student. I also have Autism Spectrum Disorder, or ASD. This fact about me has affected my whole life even though I only have had the diagnosis for a few months now. Yeah… I was diagnosed pretty recently. Usually when people think of autism, they usually think of young boys being diagnosed with it, but as a matter of fact, anyone of any age can be diagnosed with it as long as they fit the latest Diagnostic and Statistical Manual, the DSM-5.
According to the DSM-5, people with ASD have to show symptoms from a young age, even if the symptoms are not acknowledged until a later point in life. Some symptoms, or traits, are:
- Difficulties with verbal and nonverbal communication, like knowing when it’s their turn to speak or having difficulty with maintaining eye contact.
- Special interests in which a person with autism would be super fixated on such as trains, movies, astronomy, animals, or so on. Autistic people are usually very knowledgeable in their field of interests.
- Sensory input in autistic people is also a big thing. Sometimes they’re very sensitive to the world around them, such as lights being too bright or sounds being too loud to the point that it causes actual pain to the person, which may even result in meltdowns or shutdowns. Or at times, there isn’t enough sensory input, where they have to seek it out and it could make them upset if they do not get enough.
- Symptoms cause impairment in social settings or in other major areas of life. *
While these aren’t all the symptoms, traits, or signs of autism, these are the ones that stick out in me the most, as these are the one that stand out in me.
When trying to speak to people, I have difficulty knowing when to speak or even knowing how to speak. Sometimes when trying to talk, I go nonverbal due to being under pressure. I can think of what to say, but it doesn’t come out the way I want it to, or even not at all, so most people have a hard time understanding me when I’m trying to talk. I also have trouble with eye contact. I have learned that eye contact is important, as most people see it as knowing if a person is paying attention to them or not, but I still have not managed how to do it; for me it’s a very difficult, awkward and intimidating experience. A way I try to combat this is looking at a person’s nose, but even doing this, I can’t do it for very long.
I also have few strong interests, such as abnormal psychology. I can recall facts and tidbits of information easily. This interest takes over my mind and makes it difficult to focus on other things. When my mind wonders off, it usually goes to my area of interest. It’s basically the only I can think to talk about, even if those around me tell me that they have no interest in hearing it. Which makes me “annoying” if I talk about it too much, especially if I’m repeating myself trying to speak coherently.
Sensory input is also a big thing for me. Things can get way too much to handle really fast. Lights in classrooms can be painful, as so can certain sounds, such as someone tapping their pencil. This can lead me into shutdown mode and being nonverbal, or it can lead to a meltdown, which, to an unknowing person, could look like a temper tantrum (though these days I’m on a medication that helps me keep calm so meltdowns are much less frequent and less intense). Other days I can’t get enough sensory input. I will be clingy to certain people, like my boyfriend, hoping he’ll squeeze my hand or give me a tight hug. If I don’t get the sensory input from someone else, then I’ll constantly tap my hand against my leg or rub my hands together.
Growing up autistic, even when I didn’t know I was, was difficult because I was constantly misunderstood and bullied. I was constantly told that there was something wrong with me, but I didn’t know what it was. This lead to me developing depression and anxiety, which made my autistic traits more prominent, which made the bullying worse; it was a vicious cycle. Now with knowing my diagnosis, I know that it’s nothing to be ashamed of, I’m just a little different from everyone else. And everyone is different in their own way.
This is just a basic overview as someone with autism, and this is certainly not all there is to it. Autism affects everyone differently, so no two autistic people are alike. That said, I strongly encourage people to do their own research on autism so there is more of an understanding. Things improve for people when there is understanding of someone else’s differences.
*https://psicovalero.files.wordpress.com/2014/11/ds... page 88 for exact copy of the DSM-5 criteria for ASD.
