People don't really realize how bad anxiety is until it's too late. Specifically, my anxiety.

If you've read any of my other articles, you'll know that I've been struggling with my anxiety for around 10 years now, if not more. I haven't been able to find the best coping mechanisms for me, so I've been jumping around. I've tried writing, singing, drawing, I've even gone as far as to try things that people wouldn't think would help with anxiety.

Honestly, those people would be right.

I haven't found the best way for me to funnel my anxiety into productivity yet. I wait until the deadline is right on my back before I act on something because it's the only way my anxiety allows me to complete anything without going into a straight panic attack. I've tried every single thing in the book, but that's the only thing that it's good for.

I've looked back on the past relationships that I've had and realized that maybe it wasn't crumbling because of me. After pausing, I realized that maybe it was because my anxiety was always taking control and trying to be the one in charge. I would panic over tiny things - I wouldn't be controlling or anything, but I'd be sitting in my room having a panic attack over whoever I was talking to getting a tiny papercut. I mean, who does that?

I've come to terms with the fact that if I want to continue to hold a strong and supportive relationship with my current boyfriend, I really had to find a way to fine-tune my anxiety so that it doesn't go off over tiny things like that. I've realized that in order to be able to be the best that I could be, I had to figure out a way to stop my anxiety from taking over. I had to stop allowing it to be who I am. When somebody sees me, I want them to actually see me instead of the anxiety. I don't want people to only see me as the anxiety-ridden girl that went to school with them so many years ago.

I want them to see the strong woman that I'm slowly becoming.

In order to build strength, I need to first admit weakness and defeat. That's what I'm doing in this article. As I'm writing, I'm slowly admitting that I am not as strong as I wanted everybody to think. I am weak. I do have weaknesses.

But everybody does. Not a single person on this planet has a number of weaknesses lower than one. Everybody that's breathing has at least one weakness, and your strength will not begin to build up until you openly confess that you do have a weakness. Or more weaknesses, at that.

I've had too many relationships crumble due to the fact that I allowed my anxiety to take control over my body, but that's not going to happen anymore.

I am stronger than my anxiety.

I am more than my anxiety.

I am me.