Last week I watched a video on Facebook of younger girls no older than 16 and when they were asked what they hate about themselves it seemed as though they could go on forever. Yet when they were asked what they liked about themselves you heard answers like "my eyes I guess but that's it" or long pauses of nothing at all.
Growing up I've had lived with insecurities every day. People tell me it's me being needy or that I just want someone to tell me I look fine or that it's all in my head. Which granted a lot of it is in my head but what I feel is real. When these girls were asked what they like about their friends very quickly they could respond with answers like "her body is amazing" or "look at her hair and her smile and here eyes." So why is it that when it comes to ourselves it's so hard to find the good things? So here are some things that we who suffer with being insecure would like you to know.
Insecurities can come in all shapes and sizes and everyone has them; yes, even guys, your mom and dad and that super pretty girl you saw the other day. It takes a lot to push the thoughts out of your head and not let them overtake you. A lot of girls that struggle with their own insecurities don't come off that way, they always seem to be the girls with the big smiles and loud laughs. That's the thing. While, yes, we are struggling, we also don't want to bother others with how we feel so we smile as much as possible through it.
The insecurities I have some days hold me back and that's the last thing that I want. I don't buy the dress that I tried on because it was a little too tight and I'm afraid someone will make a rude comment or I'll feel gross the whole time I'm wearing it. I avoid wearing anything that is spaghetti strapped because I hate showing my bra straps and there's no way I could ever go bra-less. My insecurities sometimes make me come off angry or upset when i'm having a hard time feeling comfortable in my own body.
Also it doesn't make you childish if you have insecurities, it makes you strong. My insecurities aren't random they come from past problems in my life, whether it be parents or ex-boyfriends or girlfriends, there's always a reason behind the way you're feeling you're not "crazy" like they'll tell you. There is almost always a trigger for people with insecurities and it can be as little as someone told them they didn't look good in purple so now they will never wear purple or every time they try something purple on they won't buy it or they will ask if they look OK a million times and still not buy it. It could be that their dad didn't put them as top priority most of their life and always chose girlfriends over them that now they constantly feel like they will always be No. 2 in everyone's lives.
And the most important thing no matter how good someone's life is, it doesn't mean they can't feel bad about their situation. I'll say it again, just because someone else may have it worse than you do, doesn't make the way you feel any less important! You are entitled to your right to feel sad sometimes! But don't ever let your feelings, your insecurities become you.