Relationships are supposed to be fun and special. However, being in a relationship is hard work and requires mental strength. The point of a relationship is to have someone who supports your goals and grows with you.
But if you are constantly feeling belittled by your partner, if you are feeling trapped, you need to get out of that relationship. Especially if you are avoiding your partner-- what is the point of being in a relationship then?
Many don't want to admit that they are in a toxic relationship because they want to believe in their partner even though they aren't getting the same level of respect back. If your partner is making you feel like you are alone, then you need to open your eyes and realize that not everyone who gets in a relationship has to fight. It's okay to be single. Here are some signs that you may be in a toxic relationship.
** IMPORTANT DISCLAIMER: If you are feeling like you are trapped in an abusive relationship, please call 1-800-799-7233 for assistance. PLEASE TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THIS OR RECOMMEND THIS HOTLINE TO THOSE WHO ARE STRUGGLING. IT WILL SAVE LIVES.
1. He/she makes you choose between you and your friends.
If you feel like you're seeing your friends less because your significant other demands all of the attention, this can be very toxic. Don't let anyone say that you can't see your friends.
2. You argue pretty much every day over the littlest things.
Every couple has arguments, but they are for a good reason. If you're having an argument over something so petty, then maybe it's time to leave.
3. Your partner threatens to kill themselves every time you try to leave them.
No, this is a true story. I know this is hard because you don't want to feel like you were the one who killed someone, but in this case, you just have to leave. You need to know that mental health is important and shouldn’t be ignored, but that doesn’t mean you have to stay. Threatening to kill yourself in order to prevent someone from leaving is the sickest thing you can ever do. This is the reason why some people don't deserve to be in relationships or aren’t ready yet (especially people who are being catfishes).
4. He/she is always trying to get physical with you.
I don't care how sorry you are, the minute you hit me, it's over. That is NOT love and you can't put your hands on someone like that.
5. They are always trying to figure out where you are at all times.
If they could legally put a tracking device in you, they probably would. They always think you're cheating on them.
6. Hostile atmosphere
If you're afraid of him, LEAVE. Please see above for the National Domestic Violence Hotline to get help.
7. You’re always feeling emotionally and physically drained.
Don't blame your work life. If you aren't getting support or loving advice from your partner, then it's time to sit back and think about whether this is the person you want to spend the rest of your life with.
8. Lack of communication
Communicating is an important tool in a relationship, and is so simple. If you aren't communicating properly with your partner, then you should not be in a relationship. You're more likely to argue about nothing than communicate about something.
9. The relationship is bringing out the worst in you.
This one is pretty obvious. If everyone around you is telling you that you've changed or you're no longer feeling like yourself, it's probably that your relationship is tearing you apart.
10. You're always avoiding each other
What is a relationship if you don't want to be around that person? No, don't call it long distance either.
11. Getting extremely defensive when 2 or more people say that your relationship is toxic.
In this case, your relationship isn't misunderstood. If more than one person is sensing something wrong with your relationship, it's best to listen to their advice and open your eyes.
12. There is no level of respect.
If I'm not respected in a relationship, then I have to leave.
13. You have self-harmed because of the stress on your relationship.
I'm not going further in this one because it speaks for itself…
14. Constant negative energy
If you are getting nothing but negative and hostile vibes, you need to leave.
15. Blaming yourself 90% of the time during your arguments.
Half of the time it's not even your fault, so please stop.
16. Letting him control how you eat.
Hell no, I could NEVER. The moment I hear something degrading from my boyfriend is the day I'm single. Don't let the excuse, "I'm being honest," make you change who you are about yourself.
17. Always hearing “I’m sorry, this will never happen again, I love you.”
If you are hearing this on a constant basis, this does not mean that he/she is sorry. It's just a way to keep you in a relationship.
18. You stop going out.
Like I said in the earlier points, don't let your significant other keep you from spending quality time with friends or family.
19. Contradicting your self-worth.
Yes, NEVER contradict your self-worth, enough said.
20. You always feel as if you are unworthy of anyone else.
In a relationship, you should always feel like you are worthy. If your partner is making you feel like nothing, this is unhealthy for you.
21. You feel like you can’t do anything right.
Sometimes, it's not always you...they are NEVER satisfied with what you do, which is completely toxic.
22. You had thoughts about ending the relationship but you’re scared to be single.
This is extremely important. Many people continue to stay in relationships because they fear that they will never love or find someone else. If you are used to comfort, then look for it somewhere else. It's okay to be single sometimes because you need time to focus on yourself and not have to deal with the stress of other people.
23. You're overall unhappy.
No matter how much you love that person, if you are unhappy, then you need to leave. Mental and physical abuse is not considered love. If you need to talk to someone, don't be afraid to speak to a therapist or friends and family.