To love yourself, you have to love your body. You need to get naked (yes, I mean it) and stand in front of a mirror. Something that happens often is you spend so much time thinking your body is worse than it actually is. You need to run your hands over every inch, tracing the cracks and scars, because no matter how much you wish otherwise this body is yours. It will always be yours. You will never have that other person's legs or hair or stomach because they belong to someone else. You can achieve a body that looks like someone else's but it will still be your body. If you want to work out, lose weight, gain muscle, do it. But you have to do it for you. You have to do it because you want to get stronger or healthier or happier. If you do it because someone makes you feel like you should you will never be happy. Remember that bodies change so much throughout your lifetime. From growth spurts to puberty to old age. But your body will always be something spectacular. I love your body. I love all bodies. But I understand how reading these words may mean nothing to you. The hurtful words from strangers linger longer in our memories than the kind ones. But I'm telling you this and I mean it. No matter if you're over 150 pounds or are in a wheelchair or have a heart condition, I truly think your body is amazing.
To love yourself, you have to love your mind. You have to love it even when it's slow and groggy and hard to understand. You have to love it even when it scares you or makes you cry or makes you feel small. You are not small, I promise. To someone, somewhere, you are the whole world. I know how hard it can be to love your mind. But you need to try. You need to take care of it. You need to give your mind a break. Lie in bed a while, listen to your favorite songs, get lost in your favorite film. Tell yourself, out loud, that you love you. Allow yourself to feel whatever emotion is trying to get through. Do not deny yourself the necessity of anger and sadness. Release your emotions into a journal, a recorded text, or to someone you trust. You deserve the right to be happy. Always remember that.
To love yourself, you have to love your flaws. We all have them. In the words of Hannah Montana, nobody is perfect. I have a hard time trusting people which causes me to lose friends. I tend to assume what others may be thinking of me. I have to remind myself that flaws are a relative idea. What you may consider flaws may not be a flaw to someone else. You are who you are. Life is too short to be anyone else.
To love yourself, you have to treat yourself with kindness. I know that it may not be so simple. I have conquered my own hatred of myself so I can promise you that it is possible. It will take time and it will take awareness. Every time you think something bad about yourself, try saying five positive things. No body can be everything. You have what you have. In the end, you're going to have to accept it.
I want you to love you the way that I love you. Whatever it takes. Whatever that means. Because you are someone worth loving.
