I've been a Mardy Fish fan since I was a little girl. His father, Tom Fish, was the pro at the club in North Carolina where I learned to play tennis. I thought our connection was really cool, so I always cheered for him in the major tournaments. On the heels of his final U.S. Open, I have a different reason to cheer for Fish - he overcame an anxiety disorder to get here.
Fish began his career in 2000. Since then, he has won a silver medal in the Olympics (in Athens, 2004), and made it to the quarterfinals of Wimbledon, the Australian Open, and the U.S. Open. In 2009, Fish rededicated himself to tennis. He changed his diet and fitness plan, lost 30 pounds, and began rising in the rankings. In 2011, he passed his best friend Andy Roddick to be the number one ranked American. By 2012, he was ranked 8th in the world. Everything seemed to be falling into place for Fish, but in reality, it was beginning to fall apart.
Fish began having anxiety attacks in 2012. In an article published in The Players' Tribune, Fish pinpoints heightened expectations for himself, a feeling of inadequacy, and a physical symptom - heart arrhythmias - as the catalysts for his anxiety attacks. Fish had surgery to correct the heart arrhythmias and got back on the court. Unfortunately, the anxiety persisted; Fish needed constant company and didn't know how to calm himself down. The anxiety attacks didn't happen on the court until a third round match at 2012 U.S. Open. When Fish saw on the clock that it was 1:15am, he lost control. He played the rest of the match - and ended up winning - but does not remember any of it due to the severity of the anxiety attack. Fish's next match was in prime time against Roger Federer. It was the biggest match of his career, but he couldn't bring himself to step onto the court.
After forfeiting another match in the Winston Salem Open in 2013, Fish took a break from tennis for two years. During that time, he underwent treatment for his anxiety disorder. He focused on golf rather than tennis, going so far as to enter some mini-tours. But he wanted to end his tennis career by his own will, so he decided to play in the 2015 U.S. Open. Fish says it is his favorite tournament, so it was a perfect last hurrah. He won his first round match over Italian Marco Cecchinato in four sets. In the second round, he lost to Spaniard Feliciano Lopez in five sets.
Although it doesn't seem like the most glamorous exit, what Mardy did at the U.S. Open this year is awe inspiring. Overcoming a mental health disorder is incredibly difficult, and to do it in the public eye is even tougher. Fish managed to tame his demons to successfully end his career a hero. I would argue that what he is planning on doing in his retirement is as impressive as his feats in tennis. Fish wants to help other players struggling from similar issues, and will be working with US juniors to confront the problem in younger players. Sounds like a grand slam to me.
