Summer is right around the corner, and while some people have been working on getting that summer body for months, most people have long since given up on those pesky New Year's Resolutions. (Not that I'm complaining, because it means the gym is gloriously empty when I go to workout.) However, if you do want a great summer bod and are just nervous about getting started, don't be! Take a breath, mentally prepare yourself for what comes next by reading this article and hit the gym.
1. You realize that you may have gained a little weight.
Most of your nutrition involves Ben & Jerry's and the only exercise you do is the pilates routine that gets you into your skinny jeans. While this might seem like a perfect routine, it eventually catches up to you.
2. You decide to start hitting the gym and eating healthy.
You are pumped. You have plans: go to the gym, eat healthier than Gwyneth Paltrow and look fabulous in time for summer.
3. Since you're not sure the last time you ate something green, you go grocery shopping.
As it turns out, tiny tree things are edible. Who knew?
4. Even though you hate it, you try your best.
You consider dousing all your vegetables with ranch, but since that would defeat the purpose of eating healthy, you refrain.
5. Unfortunately, your cravings take over, and you find yourself in a constant state of hangry.
Hangry is a state of hunger that has resulted in anger. For the sake of those around you, eat something.
6. To make it a little more bearable, you try to make the low-cal version of your favorite foods.
See: protein pancakes.
7. But they. Are. A. Lie.
Do not believe recipes that claim to be the healthy version of your favorite comfort foods. The authors are either lying, sadistic, or legally taste blind.
8. Working out is essentially the same story.
Can I run for five minutes and then
lay down meditate for the next 20 minutes? Does that count as CrossFit?
9. It only takes one day for you to realize that you will never run a marathon.
In the words of my wise friend, "The only people who win marathons are the ones who don't run them."
10. Then, you venture into the weights section.
What. Is. Happening? How is everyone lifting so much weight? Are they all related to the Hulk?
11. On the bright side, there are a lot of attractive men lifting weights all around you.
Happiness is when the men's tennis team decides to hit the gym at the same time as you. And they're squatting... Booty is, indeed, rockin' everywhere.
12. You feel like you need to lie down for the rest of the year to recover.
Make that two hours. Or five. You also consider hibernation.
13. It doesn't get any better the next day. In fact, it gets worse, and you find yourself struggling to complete basic tasks.
You never realize how much you use certain muscles until you can't. Then you cry and promise to never take your health for granted.
14. You gradually come to terms with your new routine of healthy eating and working out.
15. Eventually, you dig deep and find the strength to continue.
There is still a part of you that is determined to reach your goal no matter the cost (possibly your soul).
16. Amazingly, it's all worth it in the end!
Everyone falls off the wagon at one point or another. Some of us fall off the wagon and run in the other direction. The important (and hardest) part is what comes next. Do you keep running in the other direction? Or do you choose to turn yourself around?