When I imagined the end of the year, I pictured packing up the memories accumulated in my dorm room, going to Kung Fu Tea with my friends one last time, and embarking on a two or three day drive home. Instead, I closed the year in my bedroom, clicking "Save and Submit" on a final exam.

I bet many college students, especially freshman, are missing a sense of closure. As Spring break arrived, students at UIUC just received word that classes would resume online for two weeks following break. Most of us were skeptical that this would be a two week stent, seeing that friends at other colleges were already informed that the rest of their semester would be online.

I remember walking out to the taxi to go to the airport the first morning of Spring break. My best friend woke up at 4 a.m. to say goodbye to me. If only I had known that would be the last time I'd see her until we can return to campus. And I wish I could say this will be in August, but every day the news gets bleaker and colleges put out vague statements that promise nothing.

When I return, I don't know that I'll be able to settle into college comfortably without the fear that my world could be turned upside down again. This global crisis shattered my idealization that nothing bad could happen in modern America.

Spring break was spent quarantined in my grandparents' house in Florida. (I honestly can't complain about being stuck on waterfront property). Midway through the week, the state of Illinois went into an order of extreme shelter-in, meaning I could not return to my dorm after break.

Amidst tears and stress, I frantically called American Airlines to change my flight to go back to Albuquerque. At the time, I had no idea the lengths the government would take to shut down the country---so I was determined to board a flight back to my parents in case domestic travel was cancelled.

I arrived in Albuquerque on the last day of Spring break and began classes online the next morning. It was strange continuing on with coursework in a new way as if this had been the norm. Luckily, most of my classes still operated similarly to in-person, however, it was incredibly isolating to sit at a desk in a bedroom alone each day.

By early May, I was permitted to retrieve my belongings at UIUC. The airports were as desolate as they were in March, radiating an apocalyptic energy with very few masked travelers milling around an empty space.

Instead of lamenting over the two semesters spent in Allen Hall and writing a nice note for my roommate, my dad and I stacked my belongings into my car as quickly as possible. It was nearly twenty degrees warmer on campus than when I left---a sunny eighty degrees that surely would have been spent taking cute end-of-the-year photos with my friends.

To all the boba I didn't get to drink and the sun dresses I didn't get to wear: I won't be taking you for granted next year.