Over sixteen months ago, you and I were dating.
Over sixteen months ago, we were high school seniors living in the moment, unsure at the time of what the future held for the two of us.
Over sixteen months ago, we were not only in a relationship but we were best friends.
Or so I thought.
Over sixteen months ago, I lost my virginity to you.
Over sixteen months ago, you sexually assaulted me.
It has been sixteen months since I told you to Stop and you choosing to ignore me.
Sixteen months ago, I was in pain and you weren't stopping.
Sixteen months ago,I froze & had to lay there and wait until you stopped.
Sixteen months ago, I chose to live in denial and move forward with my life as if nothing ever happened.
Seven months after that, I'm in college. We are no longer together, but still are the very best of friends.
Seven months later, I am with my new significant other, sharing my experiences with them when they stopped me and told me that what happened between us was rape.
For the first time in months, I'm frozen and taken back to that time once again.
Seven months later, thoughts of you on top of me as I'm telling you to stop and you choosing not to come engulfed my mind and suddenly, it's hard to breathe. The room is spinning. The person in front of me looks at me with concern in their eyes.
In that moment, I realize that I am a victim of sexual assault.
Being a victim of sexual assault is a horrible feeling but what is worse is when the person who assaults you starts to blame you for what happened.
He slanders your name, because he thinks that's the right thing to do.
He slanders your name,because he is afraid of the judgment and criticism that will come his way.
He slanders your name, because he knows that since you live a thousand miles away from your hometown now, that you cannot defend yourself at that time.
He chooses to slander your name, because it is an easy way out.
While he chooses to slander your name, you are choosing whether or not you want to live.
While he is out slandering your name, you are heading home on the train, trying to avoid
While he is out slandering your name, you're having a conversation with your significant other about why you are fearful of them touching you.
While he is out slandering your name, you are
Sixteen months ago, you were sexually assaulted.
Sixteen months later, you are stronger than you have ever been.
Sixteen months later, you are bolder, kinder, smarter than you were long ago.
Despite the issues you have had and still deal with, you are still the kindhearted girl who talks a bit too much for everyone else's taste.
Sixteen months ago, you were sexually assaulted.
Sixteen months later, you are a survivor.
If you or anyone else you know is a victim of sexual assault, please call 877-995-5247 or go to notalone.gov
