Going through an eating disorder is inevitably hard. By nature, they involve endless, obsessive thoughts about food and weight, self-isolation, and a number of less-than-fun mental and physical symptoms.
There are over thirty million people in the United States alone who suffer from an eating disorder. However, they are one of the most stigmatized and misunderstood illnesses. Many people with eating disorders feel ashamed and therefore refrain from reaching out for help. Others don't even have access to the resources that educate them about what an eating disorder is. Regardless of a person's place in their eating disorder, be it early in its development or years into recovery, everyone deserves respect, help, and compassion in what is probably one of the hardest times of their life.
And lucky for you, it doesn't require becoming a therapist or registered dietician to make that struggle less hard! Here are 30 things you can start doing now:
1. Don't make assumptions about who you think has an eating disorder or not
2. If someone tells you they have an eating disorder, don't assume which one they have based on their body type
3. If you're worried about someone, approach them (privately) in a way that isn't confrontational, but comes from a place of compassion
4. Let's talk more about privacy: don't 'out' someone's eating disorder (or what you perceive to be someone's eating disorder) to other people
5. Stop the diet talk. Literally no one wants to hear about your diet. Sorry
6. This also goes for talk about weight, shape, muscle mass--you get it.
7. Stop categorizing foods as "healthy" or "unhealthy"--start seeing them as just food
8. Educate yourself on eating disorders--it's more than just anorexia and bulimia
9. While you're at it, learn the warning signs
10. Encourage people to seek out help in whichever form that is accessible to them
11. Offer to go with them to that first therapy session, support group, residential intake, etc.
12. Stop being so self-critical. Recovery is a journey of self-love which is hard to do when you're surrounded by others' self-criticism
13. Offer to eat with them, or have them join you at the table
14. Try to make mealtimes with them a fun experience rather than a stressful one
15. Don't make their eating disorder about you
16. Avoid being the "food police" or "behavior police". Relapses and slips happen, try to support them rather than chastise them.
17. Delete your dieting and fitness accounts. Or at least make them private.
18. Do whatever you can to promote positive self-esteem
19. Listen without judgement, giving advice, or criticizing.
20. Don't generalize the "eating disorder experience". Everyone manages their illness in different ways
21. Some people choose to talk about their experiences openly and others don't. Recognize and honor this.
22. Don't offer simple solutions like saying "just eat" or "just stop"
23. Try to be consistent--don't change plans surrounding food last-minute
24. Model healthy eating at mealtimes (eat a variety of foods, eat when you're hungry & stop when you're full)
25. Offer to go to the grocery store or clothes shopping with them
26. Try to find activities that don't center around food
27. Donate to or share out organizations that advocate for eating disorder awareness, prevention, and treatment (Project HEAL, NEDA, ANAD)
28. Don't make jokes about eating disorders! (This one's at you, Kim Kardashian)
29. Learn the difference between eating disorders and disordered eating
30. Recognize that people with eating disorders are whole people outside of their eating disorder. Help them rediscover their passions
In short, avoid triggering others, model a healthy relationship with food and your body, and never stop learning and advocating for eating disorder prevention, awareness, and treatment. These are things that not only can help relieve some of the suffering of people with eating disorders, but they can also facilitate prevention.
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