An Open Letter To Relationships That Could Have Been

To All The Could-Have-Beens Who Weren’t At The Same Place At The Same Time

Hopefully, we will meet again and I won't make the same mistakes. Hopefully, you will say "Hi" and recount the last time we met as if it wasn't so long ago.

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A friend of mine recently brought up the concept of those who "could have been" something more. She talked about how "sometimes you meet a person and just know in your heart that if you got to know them more, you both would end up in a relationship." I call those "what-could-have-beens."

A relationship is a wonderful thing but often results out of fortunate timing. Until then, there are so many opportunities that never reach fruition. It is only after being in a relationship that one appreciates the many different people that could be in our lives, that we could have loved but can't.

Travelers know this better than anyone else. Going across the world and meeting someone perfect right before your flight the next day is an agony only jet-setters, travel bloggers, and the like know. There is so much at work: destiny, fate, the universe, timing, and a lot of luck.

When traveling with a team this past month, I met someone incredibly sweet and with whom I connected with. After only two days in the same place, it was a silly crush that I am quickly getting over. Nonetheless, it made me think of what could have been. This person could have added experiences to my life, but it was not reasonable given the circumstances.

We're lucky to have social media today, but this doesn't contribute much when we only meet someone once or twice in our lives. After that, the feeling of that moment is impossible to build upon and pursuit seems irrelevant once both people are forced to move on.

At some point, you have to believe that something greater is at work... that everything happens for a reason (as cheesy as that sounds). If we try to control the lives of other people and judge them for their priorities, nothing nor no one would satisfy us.

To those that could have been, I'm sorry I didn't open myself up to you sooner. I'm sorry I made commitments before searching for you or making room for a surprise such as you. I wish I was more outspoken so that I could have made more memories with you before I left. Hopefully, we will meet again and I won't make the same mistakes. Hopefully, you will say "Hi" and recount the last time we met as if it wasn't so long ago. I won't ever fully forget you, so please don't forget me. Maybe for the one you're destined to be with, you won't be the right person at the wrong time.

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Why You Should Stop Chasing Him

You deserve better.
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They say “the thrill of the chase" makes someone more enticing. There's just something about wanting something you can't have that drives you crazy (in a good way). There is never a dull moment. Pursuing him is a challenge. Nothing comes easily. What's the fun in that anyway?

I'm going to tell you this: stop chasing him. Stop forgiving him when he forgets to answer your text messages and phone calls. Stop being the one to always make plans. Stop letting him bail on you. Stop waiting around for him. Stop being lied to. Stop making excuses when he doesn't make time for you. There is a difference between someone who is “hard to get" and a flat out jerk who doesn't give you the time of day. Stop letting him use you.

You deserve to be with someone who makes you fall asleep every night in the middle of texting him because neither of you want the conversation to end. You deserve someone who plans dates for the two of you. You deserve someone who asks you to hang out before midnight. You deserve someone who wants to spend time with you just as much as you do with them. You deserve someone who insists on paying for your ice cream. You deserve someone who won't deceive you. You deserve someone who is straightforward. You deserve attention. You deserve affection. You deserve a partnership that is mutual, not one-sided. You deserve to be chased.

You are better than 3 a.m. “Hey" texts. You are better than a night spent watching a movie just to fool around. You are better than trying to decode his vague messages. You are better than his shadiness. You are better than mind games. You are better than being ignored.

If you have to chase him, he's not worth it. Don't settle for someone who makes you beg for his attention. If he is genuinely interested in getting to know you, he will put in the effort. A relationship where your feelings are reciprocated is far more rewarding than one where you constantly feel like you have to drag him along.

Change your mentality. Become more independent. Be confident, be bold. Find happiness in being alone. Don't waste your time pathetically chasing after someone who doesn't feel the same, but doesn't have the heart or the courage to tell you so. Your self-confidence and positivity will make you radiant, and eventually, you will attract the kind of guy who is mature enough to not mess with your head.

Cover Image Credit: weheartit.com

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Top Lang Leav Quotes For The Girl In Love

"Who you love and who loves you back determines so much in your life."

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One of my favorite modern poets is Lang Leav because she captures love and loss in a way that's both easy to read but also powerful. Some of her poems seem simple, but they hold such deep meaning when it comes to love, heartbreak and finding yourself. I'm not going to lie to ya'll, some of her heartbreak poems hit pretty hard. But, this isn't about heartbreak, this is about the beautiful feeling we call love.

Here are some of my favorite quotes by Lang Leav about love:

"It's so dark right now, I can't see any light around me.

That's because the light is coming from you. You can't see it but everyone else can."
Love & Misadventure

"You were you,
and I was I;
we were two
before our time.

I was yours
before I knew,
and you have always
been mine too."
Love & Misadventure

"I had my first dream about you last night.
Really? She smiles. What was it about?
I don't remember exactly but the whole time I was dreaming, I knew you were mine."
Love & Misadventure

"I love you, I do -
you have my word.


You have all my words."
Lullabies

"Souls do not have calendars or clocks, nor do they understand the notion of time or distance. They only know it feels right to be with one another."
Love & Misadventure

"It was a quiet love, a tacit love. It came without prelude or preamble. We never said the word love–we didn't have to. It was in our laughter, in the sense of wonder we found in each other. And if we had doubts then, time has told us otherwise."
The Universe of Us

"How much love is a person capable of giving? I thought I knew the answer until I met you."
Sea of Strangers

"When love finds you, it doesn't come as crashing waves or thunderbolts. It appears as a song on the radio or a particular blue in the sky. It dawns on you slowly, like a warm winter sunrise—where the promise of summer shines out from within."
Memories

Be still, my heart.

Whether you're falling in love or already madly in love, these quotes are sure to hit your heartstrings. Not to mention, they make pretty good Instagram captions for all your sappy love pictures!

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