There should be a word in the English language to describe the feeling of wanting to befriend someone you just think is really cool. I feel it all the time. Whenever I see someone with an interesting haircut or color, a rad pair of boots or just a fascinating energy about them, I always feel the urge to stop them on the street and ask how their day's going. I never do. I've always been too timid or too nervous to branch out and talk to the people I want to talk to, let alone hang out with them.
Well, I recently made a pact with myself to stop letting my insecurities get in the way of making new friends. It all started when a girl in my honors program, whom I've wanted to get to know for a while, approached me first and struck up a conversation about my hair. We talked for a while and I finally got to know a little bit about her. Suddenly she wasn't just the girl in Muse who was too cool for me but a girl with an actual life and a background who was letting me in.
It felt like a sign, that she was brave enough to do what I'd wanted to do for the longest time. I realized I wouldn't always be so lucky and that I'd have to get over my fears in order to continue making those unique connections with other people.
So, when a friend of mine shouted into our group chat last week asking for someone to come over and keep her company, I texted her privately wondering if we could spend the afternoon one on
one. She agreed and I was thrilled. I've always loved her style, attitude and sense of humor in the chat and when we all go out as a group, but I'd never gone out of my way to spend alone time with her. When the opportunity presented itself I jumped on it. As a result, we had a really lovely day and I got to talk to her more openly and personally than I really ever had before.
This task has grown increasingly easy as I've been doing it more and more often. When I was assigned by a professor to gather "positivity resonance" with someone over the weekend, I chose a girl in that class who always has something thought provoking thing to say. I'd always wanted to talk to her, so I did. We met in the library and chatted for an hour. She's since invited me out for drinks and I've invited her to my place of volunteering.
My point of all this is if there's someone you've been dying to get close to, don't let anything stop you. There is an infinite amount of ways to approach someone: compliment their hair, talk about classwork, invite them to your favorite dumpling spot. Oftentimes you'll find that the image you have of a person, who seems out of your league and unapproachable, is far from reality. We're all just everyday people.
