Sitting on the couch, scrolling through Facebook, as one typically does on a Tuesday evening, I came across a video clip of comedian Louis C.K. on the Conan O’Brien show. The clip was of C.K. explaining why he believes smartphones are bad and the real reason behind people who text and drive.
"People are willing to risk taking a life and ruining their own because they don't want to be alone for a second because it's so hard.”
I watched the clip, and at about 3:32, puddles began forming in my eyes (as they are doing now), because I knew exactly what he was talking about. He was putting into words something I have experienced time and time again.
At any given time, one could drive past me in my car and catch me crying or with freshly dried tears on my cheeks. Whether it’s tears of joy or sadness, for me, the act of driving alone, in silence, just me and my thoughts, brings out the rawest emotions and the deepest reflection.
As much as I love music, (Thank you, Spotify) 50 percent of the time, I drive in silence. This allows me to decompress, process a work meeting that I just came out of, reflect on childhood memories after leaving my parents house, wonder about the life of a homeless man I just passed and replay for the next 5 minutes whether or not I should have offered him cash.
Of course, there are days when silence is the last thing that I want. Days where I need to be distracted. I’m in a constant state of hurriedness and I blast my music so loud that it drains out any emotions or deep thought.
And that’s OK. I know that when I’m ready, I will get in the car, turn the radio off, put the car in drive and think. Think of my failures and disappointments, think about my insecurities and fears. It may sound depressing, crying alone in your car, but I have found, just as Louis C.K. stated, that it is one of the biggest releases of emotion that one can experience and, in turn, brings clarity and calmness, if only for a few minutes.
Try it out. Tomorrow, get into that box of metal on wheels and turn the radio off. Whether you’re on your way to work, the grocery store or meeting with friends, the bravest thing you could do is face your reality and drive in silence with only your thoughts to keep you company. When you reach your destination, I promise you will feel closer to yourself, proud of who you are or inspired to change yourself for the better.
See you on the road, tissues in hand.
