Ah, love. This mystical fairy-tale that almost everyone seems to want but has a hard time finding. I hear about my parent's and their friend's love stories, and I can't help but feel discouraged because we live in a completely different world than we do now.

I know there's a high percentage of people who read this will understand my disdain for the dating culture we partake in. There's a high chance you've felt the sting of the "talking" phase or the sharp knife of looking at his/her phone and seeing a different person light up their phone screen.

I could pick out a hundred things that are wrong with how we're doing things (and I'm not perfect either: I know I participate in this just as much as anyone), but here are the top five things that keep me thinking #ForeverAlone sounds a lot better than #RelationshipGoals.

1. Fear of commitment.

I struggled a lot with this when I was younger, and I know a lot of others do too. Our society now condones independence, that we should keep our options open and see what is all out there before we settle down. And I'm all for that; I think that it's great that we don't necessarily have this pressure to marry young anymore. But what I've discovered is that this mindset has become detrimental. People are afraid to commit to another person because they're always looking for the next best thing, always wondering if there is someone who could be a little better fit for them. We don't want to be tied down, which I understand, but it has led to us getting into bad habits, and making excuses for when there is potential for something great.

2. Social media ruins everything.

As someone who has studied social media and the impact it has on society, it is truly saddening to see what it has done to us. Trying to create this facade of a life on social media has led to self-esteem issues and can cause a lot of problems in relationships.

Do you post a picture with the person you're "talking" to? What does that mean? Will it come off as too strong or are you not official yet? Or maybe the person you're dating hasn't posted an Instagram with a cute caption of you two in a while. Does this mean they don't want to be with you? Are they not happy anymore? What happens when you see your new "thing" like all these pretty girls/hot guys Instagram photos? Do you even want to see their DMs?

Writing that out made me literally want to throw my computer at the wall, but this is what we've accepted as dating. We let social media control our lives, looking for subliminal messages or subtweets to give us any inkling of what the other person is thinking. We begin to overanalyze and create problems that may not have even been there in the first place. It makes people feel like they're losing their minds, and in a way we kind of have. We've become cowards, hiding behind our phones and computers and not really saying what we want to. Settling for a favorite as a form of interest instead being asked out on a date. What happened to talking face to face and saying, "I want to be with you and I want to make this work," or "This relationship is worth fighting for. Tell me what we need to do to make this work."

3. Insecurity and trust issues is at an all time high.

Because of the two statements above, insecurity and trust issues in the dating scene seems to be one of the biggest obstacles to overcome. How do we know that they're only talking to us? What if there is someone else? What if they are acting one way with us and then snap chatting a different person? It is awful seeing people try to make it work, yet have so little faith in the other person to actually be a good person. And there's a good percentage of the time that people are actually being shady and two-timing someone. Hence the origin of the word "f*ckboy." I hate using the word, and thought it was initially stupid, but I've had some experiences that now have allowed me to use that word in its full context. Because there is so much "freedom" in dating nowadays, we have so many options and outlets to find love, which means that people feel this anxiety that their partner is either not happy or unfaithful. And that's not how it's supposed to be.

4. "Talking" has become the new "dating."

I hate the phrase "talking." Yeah, I'm talking to this guy... like what in the world is that supposed to mean? I talk to over fifty people a day! Or she's in a thing with that guy... we can't even find a more descriptive, proper noun to talk about dating anymore! How ridiculous is that!

Back in the day, there was "dating," where you could go on dates and really figure out what you wanted. But then there was "going steady," and that meant you were exclusive. It's so hard to get past the "talking" phase nowadays, and we're still left with the same emotional pain.

5. We've become lazy and think we can cheat the system.

I think we've gotten lazy. Truly, I think that we've abused the dating culture and made it into this thing we can control and manipulate because we don't know what we want. I think that people want the perks of being in a relationship while still having the freedoms of being single. That's how people get hurt, and that's how feelings and logic get all muddled together.

People think that they can bend the rules to fit their needs, but what happens when a lot of people do that? The rules break, and we are left with this awkward, complicated anarchy of the heart. No one knows the "rules" of dating anymore.

If you don't want to be in a relationship, then don't be in a relationship. And don't string someone along who wants to/ try to force someone that doesn't want to. I feel like this isn't rocket science, but then again, the dating culture today seems to be more complicated than calculus. Bottom line: If you're gonna talk the talk, you need to start walking the walk.

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I get that in relationships, it's good to be selfish. You've got to do what is going to be best for you; I am a full supporter of that. But when you only begin to think of yourself, and your needs, and your desires, that's when we run into problems. We may have become "too selfish." I'm not saying to become selfless, but being conscious of the other person's feelings is still important. Know that what you say and do can affect others.

When you're young, you don't need to have everything figured out. I can attest to that. Relationships and love are hard, and we get our hearts broken, but it can also lead to the start of something amazing. But when we've got pop culture emulating "playing the field" with "side hoes" and "I like you but I don't want anything serious," it creates a whole big mess. And the repercussions aren't small. These are people's hearts and self-esteem and views on the world we are dealing with. And a lot of people are jaded and heart broken and turning cold to the thought of finding someone they want to spend the rest of their lives with.

I'm real over the immature and petty behavior we now call dating. We gotta step up our game and get real with ourselves. If we can't do that, how can we be honest with others? Stop leading people on and figure out what you want. If you want to be with someone, then tell them. Take the first step. Stop cheating or fooling around and commit to one person if they think you're being faithful. Be open and honest and be willing to grow as an individual, regardless of if you're in a relationship or just "talking."

I don't know how else to say it, but in the game of love, we just gotta start being better human beings.