As you can see from the title I have a mental disorder. You may think, okay so what but, in the black community that is something you don't really confess. To be black and have a mental disorder is something that is a foreign topic for the black community for black men and women. I have depression and social anxiety which is not the best of combinations, but I still make it through the days. This came about when in my childhood due to consistant bullying from Pre-kindergarten up to my sophomore year in high school. Even though I loved school because I was always excited to learn something new and hang with some friends I gradually started to despair waking up knowing I had to go to school the next morning and be picked on and even shoved. Depression didn't automatically hit me it was a slow moving process, I became so sad and then I became anxious. My social anxiety hit and I would start holding my breath when I got around crowds and walk as fast as I can to get to my destination. I even got use to not talking at all and when it was time to talk my heart will cliench and my breaths became short.

I felt alone because, I never heard of a black person having depression or anxiety. I didn't know who to talk to without thinking that I was crazy and needed to go to the mental ward. Which is one of the issues today of why black people do not speak up about what is happening to them. The black community and church go hand and hand. To go to church is what we do to go to pray and heal ourselves and ask for help. The problem is that it is to be believed that it is the only solution to the problem. The issue is that even when you go to the alter or speak of it you are deemed as weak or you have a demon in you. There is no demon inside of me and I am not weak. The perceptions that balck people can not have a mental disorder is the façade that black people always have to be strong and never waiver. To be deemed that you have a mental disorder is shoved under the rug and no one else should know because we have to be perceived as strong.

Recently, Refinery29 has released an article called "The 3 Things Minority Women Need NOW For Mental Health" featuring Lauren Carson, the founder of Black Girls Smile Inc., a non-profit organization that helps promote positive images and information for young African American women. Carson talks about her own problem with being diagnosed with depression and gives us information about minority mental health and what can be done about it. For instance, in the article it states that "While one in five Americans suffers from a diagnosable and treatable mental health disorder, Latinos, Asian Americans, Native Americans, and African Americans are more susceptible to mental health difficulties due to cultural pressures, discrimination, exposure to violence, and incarceration."

The mental health in minority groups and the stigma attached to it is mostly why it can not be healed or looked into. No matter what the stigma attached to depression and anxiety, it is not me as a person. The stigma of it does not control me and having depression and anxiety only makes me unique by looking at things at a different perspective and have more empathy for others. I have a mental disorder and i'm proud!