Dear High School Self,
Calm down. Take a deep breath. It's going to be okay. I know you're stressed out, and that's okay because you have a lot on your plate. Please, don't make yourself sick worrying about the future. If you do get sick and are forced to miss a day of school, that's okay. Personal days are good. You will have time to make up the work you missed. Stress sickness is normal, and anyone who makes fun of you for it is not your friend.
It's okay to put yourself first. It's okay to say no to letting someone copy your homework for the fourth time that week, especially after they joke about you trying too hard in school, as if it's a bad thing. It's okay to be proud of yourself, because you are doing truly amazing things. You have worked so hard these four years to make your future bright. Anyone who tries to tear you down for being successful, does not deserve you. Those people are toxic; please distance yourself. A friend who is angry at you for earning a full tuition scholarship is not your friend.
The anxiety you have will most likely never fully go away. It's always going to be there, lingering in the background. It's like standing with your toes dangling off a cliff, knowing that the slightest wind can push you over the edge. Learn to live with your anxieties, not around them. Avoiding the anxiousness will only make it worse. You are not crazy, you are not irrational, you are not overreacting. Being afraid of the future is normal, and the anxiety you feel is simply a fear of the excitement for what is to come.
Appreciate the life you have now, because things will not always come so easy once you graduate and leave home. Appreciate free rent, home-cooked meals, and being able to see your friends and family whenever you please. Seriously, nothing out there can beat Mom's spaghetti. Soon you will have to learn to support yourself, how to make your own doctors appointments, and remember to feed yourself.
I only wish you knew how many great things you have ahead of you, how so many of your dreams will come true, and how you will do things you never thought you could do. Your future is so bright, please do not let anyone allow you to forget that. Remember what is important to you, may not be important to others, and that's okay. You don't need to exceed anyone's expectations other than your own.
Remember and cherish every moment. Although high school isn't always the greatest time, there are things you will miss. So, cheer a little louder at that basketball game, hang out with your friends even if you are exhausted, and make the most of everything. Most importantly, don't forget who you are.
Best Wishes,
Alyssa
