I'm So Single And SO Not Sorry

I'm So Single And SO Not Sorry

I'm not going to apologize for living differently than you.


Moving into the new year you often reflect on your year and anything it brought you or maybe things you lost. Especially if you're single.

You're creeping up on your thirties, scared of being absolutely alone for yet another year. After you have to explain yourself over the holidays and listen to friends and family give daunting speeches about how "pretty, smart and great" you are, you just feel like you're a mess.

An absolute single mess.

Somehow everyone has created this notion that because you're pretty or smart, or have a good job, a good life, are funny, have a good personality, that you MUST have a significant other to actually enjoy yourself. Success starts being measured by marriage and children as soon as a woman hits her twenties.

Being loved by a significant other is the ultimate gain… but what if it's not?

Maybe the reason you're single is that you ARE great. Pretty. Smart. Funny. You have everything. And you DESERVE everything. I listen to those statements all the time. It's become a heavy mantra, "... but you're so great." Oh, I HEAR YA!

I'm not single because I'm incapable of dating or because I am bad at relationships or I don't know what I want — I just don't prioritize a man over my own goals.

I don't have the patience or capacity to date all the time or force myself into relationships that don't work. I don't have the energy to worry about finding a man to marry me. I have other things on my mind and fulfilling someone else's need for my relationship status ISN'T one of them.

We all grow up thinking we must look for our "other half," constantly searching, forcing ourselves like square pegs in round holes, to try and find our soul mates, and we completely miss the mark.

We're not halves. We're not made up as half a person.

If that were true, we'd pretty much never be able to function throughout our childhoods.

The thing is, love is messy. It's not easy. It doesn't come with a protection plan or an extended warranty. It isn't always beautiful and it's never perfect.

Soul mates don't exist.

When you fall in love, you're choosing to always accept someone for who they are. You have to be in a capacity to handle anything, including every flaw your partner has.

You're choosing to be OK with their weight, appearance, the way they cuss too much while watching football, how they act when they're with their friends and it's how they are when they're broken.

I've dated enough to know that I'm OK being single.

I am single because sometimes I'm picky and busy and I'm not willing to date someone who loves me for my surface. We are not surface people. We aren't just flowers. We are roots and dirt. We need more than just sunshine.

We can appreciate that people find us great and believe we deserve to be with someone. But instead of saying, "but you're so great" maybe people should simply say, "you're great." When the right people come along, it will just work. You won't have to fight it.

Life isn't summed up by who you marry or when you meet. Life is more than just a romantic story.

Be humble. Be kind. Help people. Change the world. Adopt a dog. Travel. Write. Absorb life. Try a new hobby.

You can't live on the surface of what fits perfectly in magazines and movies.

Our stories are more than title pages, and not every chapter is going to be a blissful moment. We are so far from the end of that book… why rush it?

I wouldn't even know how…

We are living our best lives. Single. Happy. Healthy.


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13 Movies Every Couple Needs To Watch Before They Get Married

Let's be honest, Rachel McAdams is in all the best love stories.


These 13 movies are the foundation of any long-lasting relationship, and I'm not joking. Each movie will show you something new about your partner, and make you ask each other the hard questions. How many kids do you want and how are you going to raise them? What would happen if you got into a horrible accident? Some are less serious though, like what if you could time travel?

I promise that not every one of these movies is a Nicholas Sparks classic, and I also promise that not every movie has Rachel McAdams in it!

1. "The Time Traveler's Wife"

This movie is both heartbreaking and amazing.

2. "About Time"

Let's be honest, Rachel McAdams is in all the best love stories. It's on Netflix right now, so grab some snacks and turn it on!

3. "Like Crazy"

This infamous Tumblr gif came from "Like Crazy." It's about a couple who goes long distance and build their life together. I used to cry every time I watched it, and I'm no crier! It also has the (now famous) Felicity Jones in it.

4. "The Notebook"

Every girl wants this kind of love.

5. "The Last Song"

Miley Cyrus and Liam Hemsworth are literally married now so if that isn't good luck, I don't know what is.

6. "Safe Haven"

You guessed it! This is another Nicholas Sparks classic. This movie has a dark twist as well, which men will love.

7. "Inside Out"

You may be thinking that this one is a bit weird. Well, this movie will help both you and your partner understand each other's emotions better.

8. "The Choice"

This movie is great because the female lead is feisty and extremely intelligent, which usually doesn't happen in love stories. How do you keep the love alive with a woman who is hard to get, and even harder to keep entertained?

9. "The Longest Ride"

Originally I could not stand the main female lead (Britt Robertson) but now she is in one of my favorite shows (For The People), so I have no choice. This movie had me on the end of my seat, and as a rom-com it is a must.

10. "The Age Of Adaline"

I began loving the name 'Adaline' thanks to this movie. This unlikely love story and self love journey really gets me.

11. "The Vow"

Imagine falling in love with someone and building a life, but an accident forces you to start all over?

12. "Titanic"

If they don't have any sort of reaction to this movie, they are probably not the one for you.

13. "Yours, Mine, & Ours"

Yours, Mine, & Ours is a true classic. Are you Helen or Frank Beardsley? You should figure that out before you tie the knot!

You're welcome!

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41 Thank-Yous To My Boyfriend Who Stood By My Side For Three Semesters And Graduation

Life will be scary and difficult sometimes, but as long as you're there to hold my hand, I know that I will always be OK.


These last several semesters at college, I've learned so much and I've changed so much, all because of one person. A person that came at a time when things were going downhill, and completely flipped my life around. I will never forget how terrible I felt before I met you, and how much better I am with you by my side. Truly, I don't know where I would be without you. And that's why it will always be impossible to thank you enough for everything that you have done for me.

But you do deserve to know how much of an impact you have on me.

1. Thank you for being my shoulder to cry on when I was struggling to get through this last semester.

2. Thank you for always listening to me rant about problems I was having with my friends.

3. Thank you for never getting tired of me talking about the same things over and over again.

4. Thank you for never acting like my past trauma was baggage or a burden.

5. Thank you for trying your best to understand and to be considerate of my anxiety.

6. Thank you for being patient with me when I take so long to process everything and sort out my emotions.

7. Thank you for dealing with my mood swings and intense emotions.

8. Thank you for never judging me over things I get embarrassed about.

9. Thank you for sharing your opinions with me, even when I didn't want to hear them, but I needed to hear them.

10. Thank you for opening my eyes to toxic behavior that I was blind to.

11. Thank you for always looking out for my health and well-being, and my future.

12. Thank you for helping me grow up and mature.

13. Thank you for always wanting to talk things out.

14. Thank you for making me feel important.

15. Thank you for giving me a reason to live.

16. Thank you for showing me what true love is.

17. Thank you for being my best friend and partner in life.

18. Thank you for breaking my walls down but never breaking a promise.

19. Thank you for keeping my heart safe.

20. Thank you for giving me endless reassurance.

21. Thank you for never making me worry about the fate of our relationship.

22. Thank you for always putting me first.

23. Thank you for being loyal and committed to me.

24. Thank you for all of the memories and adventures.

25. Thank you for never getting annoyed about taking photos.

26. Thank you for the best summer of my life.

27. Thank you for making college a much better experience for me.

28. Thank you for always putting a smile on my face.

29. Thank you for always catering to me and trying to make me happy.

30. Thank you for all the little favors you do for me and everything else you might think goes unnoticed (but trust me, I notice and I appreciate it so much).

31. Thank you for supporting everything that I'm passionate about.

32. Thank you for always making an effort to change.

33. Thank you for always forgiving me when I make (loads of) mistakes.

34. Thank you for being a good influence on me.

35. Thank you for being my role model and inspiring me to be more like you.

36. Thank you for the amount of time, effort, and love that you've put into our relationship.

37. Thank you for shaping my future.

38. Thank you for making me so hopeful and excited about everything that we are going to do throughout our life together.

39. Thank you for thinking that I'm worth it.

40. Thank you for wanting to get married, have kids, and spend your life with me.

41. Thank you for making my dreams come true.

Now that we've graduated, for the first time, we're dealing with the fact that we don't have a set path laid out for us. Real life is more than what we're used to. We might struggle to find jobs. Heck, we might find jobs but hate them. It might take forever to save up money. Things might not go according to how we planned them in our heads. We're going to have to juggle a bunch of different elements all at once. Life will be scary and difficult sometimes, but as long as you're there to hold my hand, I know that I will always be OK.

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