I have always loved the way the color green looks on me. I'm always excited when autumn rolls around and I get to wear my army green jacket and half of my sweaters are shades of olive. One of my favorite features about myself is my eyes which bounce between appearing blue and green. Because of my passion for green, I often try to manipulate my wardrobe or beauty routine to bring out the emerald pop in my eyes.
As we enter the beginning of the end of 2016, bold lipsticks are rising in popularity. Where lipsticks were once limited to shades of pink, brown and orange, lipsticks in bold red, vampy purple, and even black are becoming more commonplace. Recently, my love of green and my love of makeup have sent me on the hunt for a green lipstick. When I mentioned the idea to my friends, many of them were skeptical and urged me not to go through with my purchase. In their minds, I was going to waste my money on a GloZell green lipstick but I knew what I wanted: a dark green, a blue-green, a lipstick so dark that it was almost black. After months of searching and experimenting, I finally decided on the one.
I have my lipstick, I love the way it looks, that should be the end, right? Unfortunately, that's where my problems begin. For me, finding and buying the lipstick was the easy part. Wearing it out is where things become tricky. As a person with anxiety disorder, I worry quite a bit about the little things. And the big things. And really everything! One of these things is how people perceive me. Worrying about what friends, family, and even strangers think of me has prevented me from doing what I want and wearing the things that make me happy. This green lipstick is my first step to allowing me to be me.
Lipstick isn't permanent like haircut. It's not hard to remove or change on a whim in public like clothing. Lipstick is something that I can wear over and over again and slowly train myself not to care. Of course, this is not an easy task, but I'm planning on taming my anxiety one day at a time and my new green lipstick is the first step. I know that I like the lipstick and I think that I look good in it, so why should I need the approval of anyone else? My goal is to someday have the ability of going out and about in my new lipstick and feeling confident. Maybe it will take a month, maybe it will take a year, but I'm using my green lipstick to show my anxiety who's boss!
