Sometimes life gets hard. Even if other people have it worse, even if everyone is saying you have it easy, it doesn't always feel that way. Sometimes an individual's biggest victory is getting out of bed on any given day. If you or someone you know is living with depression, you've probably witnessed a depressive episode.
As I'm writing this article I'm wondering if it's even worth it. These last couple of weeks I've found myself slipping into one of these episodes. One of the worst parts of these tidal waves of depression is the lack of all motivation. Sure, I may have a paper due, an exam that counts for a large chunk of my grade, and some shifts at work, but my body and my mind suddenly lose the ability to function, leaving me in bed and glued to Netflix.
I try to read, I try to write, but my mind wanders onto half-produced thoughts leaving me confused and discouraged. I'm not choosing to be this way. If I could choose to be energetic and happy, I would choose that every single time. I pride myself on my grades, my accomplishments, and my work ethic. I've always been extremely driven and competitive which is what makes these episodes so damaging.
Suddenly the simplest thing, such as reading a poem for my British lit class is just as challenging as climbing Mt. Everest. My character is attacked by my mind, making it harder to stand up each time. Luckily, I have a great support system.
I can't even begin to tell you how great the USF Counselling Center has been. I used to think therapy was a joke, but the people I've encountered in my time thus far at USF have been very caring, understanding, and real with me. The Student Health Center offers affordable psychiatry. These psychiatrists don't just write you a prescription and send you on your way, they talk to you and take into consideration that your well-being is more important than any incentive a pharmaceutical company could offer.
Without these resources, I'm not sure how I could get through these episodes that always seem to come at the worst possible times. Sometimes it really does help to have someone else help you figure out what it is you're looking forward to and what your good traits are. Don't listen to the people who tell you that you're lazy or that going for a walk will fix everything. In these episodes take care of yourself, and remember that there is a huge community of caregivers waiting to help you.
