I still remember the reaction I got the first time I told someone close to me I was depressed. “You’re selfish,” they said. “You have so many things to be thankful for. How on earth could you be depressed when you have such a great life?”

With Thanksgiving just around the corner, I think it’s important to talk about how having depression, a very real and serious mental illness, does not make you ungrateful or selfish.

I am clinically depressed, and I am extremely grateful for a lot of things in my life.

A few years ago, I began experiencing the first signs of depression, and I felt extremely conflicted when I started realizing that I wasn’t just sad, but I was sad all the time. I beat myself down for it, convinced that I shouldn’t be depressed because my family was financially stable, my parents were still together, I wasn’t getting bullied, I had plenty of friends, I was involved at school, and I had great grades.

What reason did I have to be sad?

See, that’s the thing: depression is a chemical imbalance in the brain. There doesn’t need to be a reason for you to be depressed, and believing that you shouldn’t be experiencing the emotions you’re feeling will only make it worse. You could very well have a wonderful life and be well loved by those around you, and still feel tired, sad, and lonely.

There is absolutely nothing to feel guilty about. Depression is not a mental illness that only affects the poor, the bullied, or the outcasts. Depression affects people from all walks of life, and it is nothing to be ashamed of.

The moment I stopped feeling guilty for having depression was when I began realizing it’s possible to be depressed but also recognize all the blessings in your life. Depression does not occur because people cannot realize how fortunate they are. If that were true, I’d be the least depressed person you’d ever met. And yet, I’m not.

If you’re feeling guilty for being depressed know that it’s not because you’re ungrateful, it’s simply an illness. It’s not your fault, it’s not a choice you made, and you deserve to get help for it.

And if you’re one of those people who believes people with depression are ungrateful for the great things in their life, you’re absolutely and completely wrong. Your misguided and uninformed beliefs will do nothing but cause pain to people who need professional help, not a lesson in gratitude.