1. Baseball players have a better a**.
Like come on, have you ever SEEN a baseball player?? Don't get me wrong, Tony Romo is quite the looker. BUT, his butt simply does not compare. I know I'm not the only one who is daydreaming about this.
You go girl!
2. Hey boyfriend, pay attention to me...!!
I think Super Bowl Sunday is the one day of the year that I basically don't exist. Wait, scratch that. Anytime the Ravens are playing, I don't exist. Any girlfriend can relate on this point because on Super Bowl Sunday, we are an inanimate object on the couch.
At least give her some pretzels and a beer...
3. WHEN DOES TAYLOR SWIFT COME ON?
I am so excited for Tay to sing Blank Space! Wait, what? Taylor Swift isn't performing in the halftime show? It's Katy Perry?!? I don't even know why I'm watching this.
Tay, you're not insane, they are.
4. I want a Budweiser puppy.....
I honestly thought that after last years Budweiser commercial, it would be impossible that there would be anything cuter. But I'm in love. Hey boyfriend who doesn't think I exist, want to get me that puppy for Valentines Day??
If you just scroll right past this, there is something wrong with you.
5. Must. Stop. Eating. Chips. And. Dip.
I am not a pig, I swear. But it's my favorite dip... AND they have queso. I don't really know if I am going to be able to stop anytime soon. Like..... ITS CHIPS AND DIP. I'm not even thinking about the carbs right now.. Or that I'm double-dipping.. Or the cheerleaders bodies. Nope, I'm not.
I would much rather watch Mean Girls right now.
6. Who's playing again?
It's the Broncos versus the Seahawks, right? Oh, sh*t that's not right. It's the Patriots. Honestly, I don't even know what cities those teams represent.. I'm just gonna keep eating chips and dip.
It's okay Zooey, so am I. So am I.
7. I could be a cheerleader, I can dance like that.
No, but really I have the moves. I've seen them. My friends have seen them. I bust a move in frat basements. It's the body that I need to work on. And the face. Hair. Eyes. Hey boyfriend, STOP LOOKING. LOOK AT ME.
Meghan Trainor says it best; I'm hot even if I'm not a cheerleader ;)