8 Cliché Art School Students
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8 Cliché Art School Students

A who's-who guide for new students

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8 Cliché Art School Students
http://www.danforthart.org/artclasses.html

Entering college, I was very aware that every campus has any number of stereotypes each student fits under. For “traditional” college campuses, there’s the jocks, cheerleaders, frat-bros, sorority girls, nerds, stoners and too many more to list. To me, that didn’t seem too far from the cliques that I had become accustomed to seeing around the halls in high school. However, it wasn’t until I found myself attending a liberal arts school in downtown Chicago that I learned there are even more goofy stereotypes that I had yet to come across. Seriously—the list of college cliches I’m aware of has grown exponentially since I first started attending school just under a year and a half ago. Ergo, I’ve compiled a list of the most common art school students that I’ve come across. Maybe, just maybe, this will give incoming students a better understanding of who they will be interacting with on campus.

1. The film student

Careful around this guy. There’s no telling just how extensive his knowledge of cinema might be, and he would more than likely show no mercy when using this knowledge to size you up. You may think you know movies, but there’s no way you can identify as many neorealist characteristics within Vittorio DeSica’s 1949 classic, "The Bicycle Thief." Believe me, your taste in movies is by no means anywhere near as cultured and elegant as his.

2. The girl who never seems to not be smoking a cigarette

Seriously, who is this girl? She’s always standing outside of the dorm, smoking away. Come to think of it, I’ve never seen her in any other situation. When I leave for class at 7:30 in the morning, there she is, smoking on the curb. When I get back from a late night movie, she’s huddled up against the wall, lighting a cigarette in the cold. I don’t know whether to preach to her about the health risks that come along with smoking, or invite her inside for coffee and give her a place to stay for a bit.

3. The theater major

Be sure you have a pair of headphones when interacting with these students. Alone, they may just appear to have snorted a whole bunch of happy-cocaine, and have their voice volume turned up to the max at all times. In bigger numbers, however, you’ll hear songs from musicals you didn’t even know existed, and there will be no protecting you from the Beyoncé dance moves they will be busting out before your eyes.

4. The guy with the nose ring and tattoo sleeve that might not know how to operate the shower in his dorm room

He’s really nice, but what the hell is that smell? From a distance, he just appears to be a dude with interesting style, but up close, he smells like when you open the tupperware container that has the 3-week-old leftovers inside. Of all people, why does he always want to give me a hug?

5. The overly conservative kid

OK, you’re entitled to your political views, but if you’re going to openly express your anti-gay and sometimes kind of racist views, why on earth would you want to go to an art school in Chicago? That’s like saying you dislike hockey, then buying season tickets to the Blackhawks games.

6. The overly progressive kids

We get it, you accept everybody for who they are. That’s really a great characteristic, and you should be proud that you’re open minded enough to empathize with the feelings of others, but get in line. For real, you’re at an art school; we’re all pretty dang open minded here. You don’t need to spend fifteen minutes explaining why playing Cards Against Humanity means that I’m enabling discrimination.

7. The girl who has a different hair color every time you see her

Wait, this girl had neon green hair just two days ago. You’re telling me that it’s already light purple? Slow down! Give your parents enough time to process each hair color, unless you’re hoping it will distract them from noticing that you got your septum pierced.

8. The guy who looks scary but is actually really nice

At first, he looks terrifying, but after you have a conversation with him, you'll find that Keith is a really cool guy!

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