I've been on this earth for 18 and a half years now, and in college in New York City for four months. While I will by no means claim to have some incredible supply of wisdom and knowledge, there are a lot of things I've learned during my first semester here.
1. Within our lives, we are born and we die hundreds of times.
On June 5th, 1997, I was born. The day I learned that the factory on the outskirts of town was producing pollution, not clouds, I died. The first time I hiked to the top of a mountain and could barely tell where the lights of my town started and the stars stopped, I was born again, and I died once more the last time I saw that beautiful little town recede from my view out the airplane window. Before the end of our days, each of us will die hundreds and hundreds of tiny deaths, and be born again and again into new versions of ourselves.
2. Travel is imperative to growth.
Staying in the same place for years and years can teach innumerable valuable lessons, but nothing can teach you the same things as being on your own in a strange city. In each new place you experience, you learn from the surrounding people and culture things that are entirely unique to that location. I really believe that everywhere you go has a fundamental effect on who you are as a person, and that should be embraced and encouraged.
3. Coconut oil will fix all of your problems.
Put it on your skin, in your hair, on your broken heart, in your smoothies...honestly, just slather it all over your life.
4. OK, maybe not all. But water will fix the rest.
As much as I wish I could live solely off espresso and cucumber slices, that's just not the way the world (or the human body) works. It's so easy to forget to drink water, but it's so important. It will help your skin, your mind, your body, your mood, everything.
5. If water and coconut oil fail, coffee will do.
Coconut oil, water, and coffee: my holy trinity. I'm not going to try to pretend that I'm not heavily dependent on coffee to go about my daily life.
6. There's no substitute for experience.
They say the only real way to learn a foreign language is to be immersed in it, to speak with natives, to really experience it. This isn't just true for language, but for life at large; we cannot be content with reading about politics or with learning about different countries in school and thinking we understand. If you're interested in politics, go out and get involved firsthand. If you're interested in the nuances and intricacies of Ghanaian culture, find a way to make that trip happen. Real experience is second to none.
7. Sometimes it's good to be impulsive.
Of course, moderation is important, but every once in a while it's important to trust your first impulses. I applied to the New School on a whim, and almost a year later, here I am experiencing things that never would have been possible anywhere else.
8. Don't deprive yourself of the things that make you happy.
If you want to listen to Christmas music in September, do it. Write with nice pens, eat ice cream on your kitchen floor, dance terribly in front of everyone at concerts, read "unsophisticated" books, sleep until 2 p.m., and don't apologize for any of it.
9. Everything changes, and that's OK.
If you leave home, you will lose a lot of friends, and you will make a lot of new ones. You'll forget the way your town looked in the fall as you walk down the streets of your new home. A year from now, you won't be the same person you are today. You'll be nostalgic, and you might wish things could go back to the way they were. That's OK, it's normal. Just know that change is inevitable, and try to embrace it.
10. No matter where you are, make some time to watch the sunset.
Every once in a while, just stop what you're doing for a few minutes and watch the colors change as the sun recedes past the horizon. See if you can find the shade of pink that always sprinkles the mountain trails when the flowers start blooming in the spring, or the purple of the bruise on your hip from misjudging the location of your kitchen table in the dark. No two sunsets are alike, and every single one of them is worth looking at.
11. Never let anyone invalidate your experiences.
Just because something "won't matter in 10 years" doesn't mean that it can't matter now. Don't let yourself be told that what you're experiencing is insignificant.
12. Learn everything you can from the people around you.
Everyone you'll ever encounter knows something that you don't. Let them teach you. Let your new friend show you how to really listen to others, let your teacher talk to you about philosophy, and let yourself take on the characteristics you most admire in others. Be open to new ideas, thoughts, and perspectives. Learn.
13. The world is full of magic.
This is something we all learned when we were children, and that we all tend to forget as we grow up. Try to remember what all that magic felt like. Let Neutral Milk Hotel remind you "how strange it is to be anything at all." Go somewhere beautiful with someone who makes you feel alive and look at the sky--really look. Think about the moon and the stars and the way you used to find pictures in the clouds. Don't let the child in you grow up.
14. You can't save everyone.
We all know people with self-destructive habits, difficult lives, or poor judgement, and we all want to help them, but sometimes it's just not possible. Sometimes you just have to step back and realize that some people don't want to be saved. If you're lucky, someday they'll save themselves, but until then all you can do is be there.
15. The world has enough negativity. Don't add to it.
This doesn't mean you have to be all happy-go-lucky all the time, just make an effort to maintain some level of positivity. Write down good things that happen to you, let go of petty grudges, ask someone what the happiest moment of their life was and watch their face as they talk about it.
16. People will disagree with you, and sometimes there's nothing you can do about it.
Maybe your grandparents would disown you if you got a tattoo, maybe your parents are voting for Donald Trump, maybe your brother doesn't believe in feminism. And maybe those opinions are never going to change. Learn to choose your battles.
17. Don't let yourself become stagnant.
Even if it just means that you take a different route to school or change up your usual coffee order, don't let yourself fall into too much of a rut. Change is absolutely crucial to growth and to learning.
18. You've made stupid decisions. You'll make more. It's fine.
It may feel like the end of the world, but it's not. Learn from it and then let it go.
