Preseason, or "Hell week" as it has been admirably referred to, is a time where collegiate athletes arrive early to campus for intense training before the school year and season begin. A confusing mix of fear and excitement are normal, as our bodies are put to the ultimate test. Though we look forward to spending time and bonding with our teammates before the rest of the student body moves in, we are overwhelmed and overworked by the pressures of the ensuing week.
There are many pre-season norms that NARP'S are not familiar with, and would probably judge us for. For the record, a NARP is a non-athletic-real-person, and every athlete rues the day they'll turn into one. It means the end of competition, and the end of the most challenging and inspiring part of our lives.
Preseason is both difficult and interesting, and here is what you can expect along the way.
1) "I'm not showering."
All week you are a giant, sweaty hot mess. There is no point in showering when you have three-a-days and you're just gonna get gross two hours from now during middle session. That's what deodorant's for. And baby powder, lots of baby powder.
And when you have to wear the same outfit to every practice, it's definitely not gonna happen.
2) "I am SO hungry."
After sprints and agilities in the morning it is fully justifiable to eat the whole spread of food in the cafeteria. There's no way that banana and granola bar are going to hold you off until dinner. You burnt the calories, you deserve it- eat up!
3) The Run Test.
This is a big one. There is no greater anxiety than having to pass the conditioning test first thing on the first dreadful morning. The prior days of meetings and paperwork will never be a strong enough distraction. You're done for.
4) Passing the Run Test.
You did it. It's over. Call your mom, call your friends, call your boss. You are the fittest, toughest person you know, and you can finally live stress free. Until coach says "get on the line" again.
5) All the Meetings.
6) I'm Burning Alive.
Preseason practices take place in the dead heat of August. It's not uncommon for at least one of your teammates to pass out of heat exhaustion, if not you. Bring a cold towel!
7) Hydrate, Hydrate, Hydrate!
8) Who has Sunblock?
Being the fair one on my team I'm always packing that SPF. Sun poisoning is no joke and with the immense amount of sun exposure during the week you'll need to keep re-applying, unless you want some killer tan lines.
9) But They're Inevitable Anyway.
You'll basically have a permanent sports bra engraved into your skin. If you play a sport that involves shin guards, expect a big block in the middle of your thigh that is darker than both the bottom and top of your leg.
10) Unwavering Anxiety and Soreness.
Whether you're a returning player or not, preseason is essentially one long try-out. If you want to stand out and earn a starting position or playing time you have to really work hard. The immense amount of pressure to do so leaves your body and mind feeling pretty burnt out.
11) Who Needs Ice?
The ice count after practice is ridiculous and everyone hobbles around with ice packs taped all over their various ailing body parts. A very painful but therapeutic ice bath at night is expected.
12) Naps On Naps On Naps.
Spontaneously keeling over during breaks is one of the only ways to get yourself through. You have to leave for another session in 20 minutes, so definitely grab a nap over anything else. Priorities.
13) Stretching and the Warm Up Lap.
Arguably the worst part of each day. In order to prevent injury you HAVE to stretch. Depending on your coach you'll have a set number of laps and team stretches to do before drills and scrimmaging, and they are not easy to acclimate to.
14) Team Bonding.
The silver lining throughout the whole week is that you are not alone in your struggles. You have a full team of people in similar life situations that you can both learn a lot from and have fun with. Whether coach organizes a group activity or you take a trip to the beach on your off day, you are surrounded by friends.
15) You're Ready for Season.
Now that you have survived the hardest week of your life, you are prepared to take on every team in your division/ conference. Give yourself a pat on the back, and get ready to give them all a run for their money. They're going down.
