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15 Lessons The 2016 Olympics Taught Me

Who Knew You Could Learn So Much By Watching Other People Work Out?

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15 Lessons The 2016 Olympics Taught Me
Sports Illustrated

The most anticipated time of the year has arrived: The 2016 Rio Olympic Games. Here, the most amazing world athletes compete for their country, while viewers can feel the adrenaline, joy and frustration vicariously through the athletes and a television screen. People see the victories and losses and some things in between, so what can you find about yourself through watching such amazing talent?

1. I would never in a million years look good in a leotard

Let's be honest, those outfits look prone to wedgies, tears and many stomach rolls. The Olympians wear them with grace and beauty considering low body fat, but oh my if I wore that people would be running for the hills. Props, Olympian gymnasts, props.

2. If an Olympic athlete can trip over a hurdle, there is no way on earth I'm ever jumping over any object ever again

Extreme coordination is an understatement for these athletes, and well, I'm on the opposite end of that spectrum. If they fall while doing hurdles, I truly don't believe sidewalk cracks are safe anymore.

3. Since I thoroughly enjoy Reese's Peanut Butter Cups and Moose Tracks ice cream, I don't believe I'll be having an eight pack anytime soon

If dessert were the only meal requirement of such a prestigious athlete, I'd for sure win the gold in some event. I wonder if they even know what sugar tastes like, but then again I bet they don't complain considering I'm losing count while looking at their abs..

4. Pole vaulting will forever be out of the question

Putting my entire amount of trust in a skinny little pole to launch me high in the air? Noooo thank you, I can barely run without anything in my hands. (Although tripping or snapping pole might be the highlight for spectators.)

5. Olympic swimmers should make up the USA's population of pool lifeguards

There is no one I would trust my life with more than with an Olympic swimmer. Heck, one of them could probably rescue 10 drowning people at once. Then again it's difficult to do the butterfly stroke while trying to save lives.

6. I need to become an Olympian to meet Zac Efron and receive a tweet from T-Swift

High School Musical heartthrob and pop music icons recognize and even VISIT these athletes? Count me in! (Zac, I'll also be expected a smooch on the cheek for my hard work. Thank you in advance).

7. A couple gallons of milk a day might keep broken bones away

Everyone saw the poor gymnast snap his tibia during his vault routine, right? I'm switching to an entirely dairy diet so I don't break something while walking, sitting or maybe even sleeping. Yikes.

8. Diving = automatic belly or back flop

I just recently learned how to dive off a mat that was at water level. Hold your horses people I know that's talent right there! The thought of diving off an Olympic diving board has me praying to the Lord above He would take me before I'd slap on the water.

9. I'm not as short as I once thought, but then again...

Olympic gymnast versus Olympic basketball player versus average 21 year old girl? Let's play a guessing game at who would win a dunking contest (hint it's definitely not me).

10. Practicing my dances moves has not been put to waste

Dancing while cooking, during hockey practice, and even down the middle of the street has all prepared me for this moment. I have been secretly preparing a routine to "You Can't Touch This." The title of the song speaks for itself; I'd be so sweaty you wouldn't even want to give me a high five. Thank you MC Hammer

11. I'm probably never going to visit Rio

As much fun as standing under the arms of Jesus sounds, I prefer water that doesn't have infections in every couple tablespoons or objects floating in it. I'll stay at home... Now if only we could get people to stop peeing in pools...

12. Road curbs do not suffice as balance beams

After watching gymnastic routines, I was determined to walk on every curb possible. Spoiler: don't attempt a cartwheel on cement curb edging, there's no padding around.

13. Olympic athletes' neck muscles are abnormally strong

Do the athletes have to do neck exercises to hold all their glory? One medal would probably pull me to the ground, in that case holding medals should be an Olympic event in and of itself.

14. Purposefully trip at the end of a race and you'll win an awesome prize... a gold medal!

Or possibly even a really bad track burn! The female sprinter who dove to win gold? Still not sure if that was planned or not, but I'd like to applaud her for looking like the average human at that second; made me feel good about any future embarrassments.

15. The amount of flips in a floor routine makes nauseous

I'm convinced the dance moves between flips and tricks is actually just the gymnasts attempting not to fall from dizziness. How are the able to spin around so many time without upchucking their previous meal?

Good and bad or positive and negative lessons can be learned from cheering on athletes from across the globe. Whatever can keep the United States population distracted from arguing about the political race, right?

*Warning: Watching the Olympians does NOT give you their ability to perform, do not try these at home.*


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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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