I was never cool. In high school, I was the girl on the outskirts of everything – not really involved in anything and not popular, but people knew who I was I had my specific group of friends, and that was that.

I always saw myself as invisible. No one really noticed me. Often upon meeting someone for the second time, they wouldn’t remember my name or that they had even met me before. As you can imagine, this took a toll on my self confidence.

I was the smart girl – the goody-two-shoes with perfect grades. That was the only opinion people had of me. People came to me for answers on their homework and to proof-read their papers. Boys were rarely interested, I was apart of a toxic friend group, and often fought with my mom.

I thought there was no way I would ever live up to the level of a “popular” girl. They had everything they could ever want – looks, great friends, money. I was just a girl in their class. I was someone they would never remember after graduation.

But in the year since I’ve left the walls of Wilmot Union High School, I’ve learned a few things.

At the time, you feel as if those four years are your entire life, and you’ll never get out of them. You assume that who you are now is what you’ll be like for the rest of your life. But that couldn’t be anymore false.

Who you are in high school is not who you will be forever. You will grow so much just in the year following that you won’t recognize that girl who let everyone walk all over her. Those who claim that high school is the best four years of your life clearly have not lived very great lives. The world is so much bigger than world history class.

Since high school, I’ve grown to love who I am. I’ve realized what I want out of life, and I’m making a conscious effort to go after it. I’ve really worked on changing my outlook on life and creating a positive atmosphere. I no longer deal with the drama and the people who cause it. I only surround myself with those who make me feel good about myself and support me through everything I do. I have a great couple of friends, and I don’t feel sad that my circle has gotten smaller. Lots of friends does not equal lots of happiness. You need to make sure you have quality people around you for when the going gets rough, but also to cheer you on while you’re doing amazing things.

My parents and I still have our spats as families do, but I feel as if we’ve never been closer. I trust them completely and feel comfortable talking to them about everything that goes on in my life. I am so grateful to have been blessed with two amazing individuals for my parents who are willing to break their backs to make sure life works out for me. Family means everything to me, and it makes me sad it took me so long to realize it. College has been hard being away from them, but I know they’re only a phone call or an hour long drive away.

The boy who asked me out in high school still sticks by my side and selflessly does everything he can to ensure that I am happy. We worked together through all of the rough patches that long-distance brings upon a relationship, and we have come out even stronger. He has helped me grow out of my shell and realize that I’m no longer that shy little girl that no one paid attention to. I can’t imagine anyone else I would rather be with.

As for that goody-two-shoes girl with the great grades? She’s still around. I’ve managed to be on the Dean’s List and in the Honors College for both of the semester I’ve completed this far, and I plan to continue on that path. I’m double majoring, minoring, and working toward a certificate, all while maintaining two jobs. I even started writing these articles (a great start for my hopeful journalism career)!

I’m unbelievably happy and proud of myself for all of my accomplishments, but I have even more pride in the fact that my self-confidence has gone up in leaps and bounds. I no longer agonize over meeting new people, the idea of not being the most popular girl around doesn’t make me want to shrivel up and die and I am able to look in the mirror and love myself. The feeling of accepting yourself is worth so much more than popularity.

In high school, I was a nobody. But once life really starts, and you’re not surrounded by the same group of people everyday, you realize that you can be literally anything you want. I’ve been able to surround myself with people who are genuinely invested in my well-being and who care about the things that I’m doing. I’ve gained a lot of self-confidence and respect for myself, and I’ve truly never felt happier.