It’s got nothing to do with lack of passion or story.

It has everything to do with the truth that creatively, I am growing. Remaining in a community (even if it’s for writers) that I used to be a part of still makes me feel tied there and honestly, with where I’m currently at in my life… I really dislike that feeling of being tied down.

I am not tied to my past and that shouldn’t be a thing I am afraid or ashamed to admit. Freedom is something we’re meant to proclaim boldly. College, for me, was a time that is now almost two years in the past. The past is meant to remain there while still giving me wiggle room to learn from those moments today.

I need to let go of it, even if that means leaving this community of Odyssey.

2016 brought it’s fair share of crap to the world with big celebrity deaths and other awful circumstantial things. But personally, it gave me a means to stretch, grow, and let go of who I once was and step into who I am meant to be. For that, I will always remember 2016 as a fantastic year. A huge part of letting go more and stepping forward in the future is being able to differentiate between “yes” and “no,” being able to create healthy boundaries for myself personally and with other individuals.

I came home in July knowing I wanted to write. Odyssey was a great fit for me at the time. Five months later, I feel like a plant too big for the pot and I’m yearning to branch out and stretch my roots with other online platforms, blogging, creativity, and networking. It’s just like college — when I entered as a new student, I was a small fish in a new pond. When it came time for my senior year, I felt as if I had outgrown the pond and was ready to really move on.

I think it’s a normal thing to do that in life, especially with the ebb and flow of seasonal changes, both metaphorically and physically. We are meant to grow and then outgrow things, constantly stepping forward into newness that will grow and stretch us into the people we are meant to be in God’s eyes.

A part of me respecting my boundaries and moving forward into the new year with clarity requires that I let myself break the pot I want to jump out of now that I am branching out. It requires splashing into new avenues of getting my writing seen and known. This does not mean I forget my past, Odyssey, or leave it behind like it doesn’t matter, because every part of who I am is because of what has happened in the past, the opportunities I’ve been given, and the people I’ve met.

Honestly, I’ll remember this platform as the first that gave me a means of sharing my voice elsewhere when that’s what my desire was upon my return home. My desire still remains, but I also want to create a line between the past; now, moving forward into something new and completely different.

I believe in the power of leaving things behind in order to grow because I did it for a year abroad. I also believe in the power of remembering where I started and came from in order to get me to the place I am today personally and spiritually. I would not be where I am now had it not been for Eastern Nazarene College and the people inside that community that stretched and pushed me toward the Lord, accepting me even when I put up a face and ignored the fact that I was a mess. I would not be where I am today had it not been for the Squad I traveled the world with and the people that did the exact same. The breakthrough eventually came four months before the end of my journey.

I think the real magic happens when pieces of the past collide and are recreated into something completely new in whatever present reality looks like now. All of us are pieces, but the lines we draw between past and present mentally, physically, and spiritually are what grow us into better human beings.

I am drawing the line creatively in order to grow. I am forever grateful for the people who have put their time and effort into reading my writing for Odyssey and publishing it.

Odyssey, this is goodbye.

And Thank You.