Throughout our life we encounter people who we grow fond of and enjoy spending time with. This happens often during the college years and in our 20's. This is a time when we are finding ourselves and figuring out what types of people we want to grow relationships with. When you choose to spend your time with the opposite sex, usually one of those two people have different intentions than the other does. And if the intentions were never there for either person at first, different intentions eventually form. Not ALL the time, but in most cases, this seems to be true. This is where the "just friends" category comes into play.

Once I entered college, I realized that the friendships I once had would change. Not only that, but the dating game would change as well. Many of times I have found myself in situations where that "guy friend" was strictly only a guy friend and in other situations where he happened to be more than a friend. It's hard to differentiate between the two when you are unsure of how the other person feels. It's human nature to feel things, even when you didn't mean to.

Whether you are intimate with that person, spend your free time with that person, or maybe even both there's still a fine line between just friends and being more than that. To the girls and guys who are in a "just friends" scenario currently or have been in one, then I'd like to share what I have learned about it.

There have been several friendships I have formed over the years while in college with the opposite sex. Some were only friendships to me, and some I thought of to be more. There is nothing more embarrassing or such a slap in the face than someone telling you that you are "just friends" when it was clear that it seemed like it was more.

Let me clarify the "JUST FRIENDS" rule since it seems like some have forgotten: You should not be intimate with someone who is just a friend. Friends do not kiss each other nor stay the night together. You should not use someone as a rebound and then call them your friend. A friend is someone who is there for you, who supports you, who is honest and lifts you up. That is my realest definition of a friend, even if it's a friend of the opposite sex. A friend does not come with any type of romantic strings because you would never put a friend in a position to feel that way if they were truly "just a friend."

You should never lead a friend on if you know that you have no intentions of pursuing something more.

I believe that people use the "just friends" excuse when they are scared of commitment. Or maybe they truly aren't attracted to that other person in an emotional or physical way. Maybe they spend time with that person when they feel lonely. The saying we are "just friends" is CRAP because people use it as a polite excuse to feel no remorse for hurting the other person's feelings when they are in the wrong. When you begin a friendship with someone, do not give the other person mixed signals and leave your intentions unclear.

So, if you are in a "just friends" situation, I'm sorry. I know that it sucks. Remember that only insecure men and women give you mixed signals then tell you that you both are just friends. It's a boost to their ego and cures their loneliness while giving them an excuse to feel no remorse for leading you on into something that was more than a friendship.

If someone is just your friend, treat them as just a friend. It's so unfair to get someone's emotions caught up in something that will never be anything. Keep that in mind the next time you tell someone that they are "just a friend." People's feelings do matter.