I competed for the indoor track and field PSAC's and I did terrible. I was ranked top three for seating in the PSAC's, but in the end, I ended up not even top eight. I felt useless as if I were doing this sport for no reason. I felt like maybe determination and passion won't get me anywhere. I let the fact that I am a mental case get in the way of my dreams.

After failing at a height in High Jump that I could have easily gotten, I cried. I was angry at myself because I know that I can do well. Yet, I continue to fail constantly. People tell me all the time that God has a plan, and that everything happens for a reason. Why would God just decide out of his busy day, that all my hard work would not pay off? I don't have the answers, but I do know that this did happen for a reason. This was my wake-up call to life. In life, we will be at the top of the world one minute, and the next time we fall. This entire season I was on top and suddenly I found myself on the bottom. This taught me that I have to be strong. I can't have a panic attack or cry because I KNOW that I can be all that I am and more.

So yes, I lost today and I'll probably lose a lot in my life. The losses that I accept will bring me closer to my win. I will never let PSAC's determine who I am as an athlete ever again. It may be important to gain a title, to be that somebody on a podium, but it isn't all that I look for in life. Next time I jump it's going to be because I want to be the best. Not because I want everyone to see that I am the best. Next time I won't cry, because I will win. Because PSAC's can never define how great I am. Only I can do that.