Regret is a strange, seemingly untamable entity that we have all encountered at least once. Our thoughts of “what if” meet our feelings of “should have, would have, could have,” and become unrealistically magnified. And although regret is a completely normal part of life, it can be absolutely draining and undeniably negative.

With that in mind, I have decided something once and for all: I no longer believe in regrets.

In my opinion, the experiences we encounter on a day-to-day basis shape us, and the decisions we make, or choose not make, help us develop into the people we are meant to be. Arguably, there have been, or will be, experiences in our lives that are unpleasant, difficult, or painful, and may lead to feelings of regret. Life can throw us curveballs now and then, but it’s the way that you handle the situation, recover from the setback, and grow from what you've learned that matters the most.

You may ask yourself if you stayed in a broken relationship for too long, or if you should have run for the position that everyone said you’d be great at, and wish things had been different. But think about all of the mental energy you’re spending looking backwards at things that can’t be changed, and how you could instead be using what you have learned for the future that’s ahead of you.

That isn’t to say that those “what if” and “I should have” moments will completely disappear after swearing off regrets, and I would be lying if I said they would. It’s natural to look back and question – it means you care.

But it’s also important to trust your judgment, and to remember why you did what you did in the moment. Although you may find yourself wondering now and then if you’ve made the right choices, the answer is that you did, because you know better than anyone else what’s right for you.

The quote, “never regret anything because at one time it was exactly what you wanted,” could not be truer, and is something to keep in mind when looking forward, not backwards.