I was exposed to loss at a young age since I lost many important people during my youth. The first time I remember being devastated due to someone passing away was when my Mama's aunt died in 2003. I was six years old and my Mama's aunt was everything I ever wanted to be: humorous, glamorous and loving. When she died, I felt like a part of me died with her. I remember staying up every night for a month since she passed, crying and wondering if I would ever feel happy again. At that age, I didn't know how anyone else felt, because I was so distraught with my own emotions.

When my family lost a young family member in January, I relived the pain I felt in 2003. This time, though, I didn't just notice my emotions. I found myself crying not only because I was devastated, but because someone I love dearly was devastated. The mother of the young man that passed away is like a second mother to me and she has always been there for me. When I answered my phone that cold January morning and was told that my cousin died unexpectedly, I fell to my knees in pain. My heart hurt, because I knew that someone I love lost someone that was her whole world.

Along with my parents, I went to her house every day. I didn't know what to do or what to say. All I knew was that I had to be there for her. When she needed space, I respected that. When she needed a hug, I was there with my arms, ready to squeeze.

Fast-forward to now, it has been eight months since the worst day of my life... but all I can do is think about her. These eight months have been hell for me, but what about her? What can I do to make it better? What can I say to bring back some light to her eyes? I don't know. All I know is that I'm here. I have lost someone...but, more importantly, someone I love has lost someone they love.