Recently I went through a rather rough breakup. It was an uncomfortable experience, and it did not go the way either of us would have liked. Whether your breakup is rocky, amicable, mutual, or somewhere in between all those, these are some of the ways I learned to cope with the end of any relationship.
1. Treat Yo’Self
Buy yourself that purse you’ve had your eye on for months, or the awesome pair of shoes you’ve only dreamed about owning. Go on a daytrip to someplace nearby; hell, splurge and get a hotel for a night and make a weekend of it! Drive to your favorite burger place that’s 20 miles away, and grab a friend to take with you. Don’t blow your entire life savings over one person, but definitely treat yourself, because you deserve it.
2. Enjoy Your Favorite Comfort Foods
One of my favorite things in the world is mac n’ cheese with sliced hot dogs, but I almost never eat it. Whatever your go-to comfort food is, be it baked potatoes, burgers and fries, clam chowder, or any of the other amazing cuisines of the world, enjoy it! Heck, pick a few and make a wonderful week of it. Comfort foods can go a long way in helping you feel better.
3. Cry/Scream/Yell
Breakups are hard, but most of you already know that. Don’t bottle up your emotions about it, but don’t force them out either. If you feel like crying, cry; cry about all the ways they did you wrong, and all the things you wish you could have done. If you feel like screaming, scream; scream about the good times and the bad times, and even the in-between times. If you feel like yelling, yell; yell about all the ways they made you mad and all the reasons you’re glad they’re gone. And if you don't feel like doing any of these, then don't. Do whatever you want, vocalize your frustration, anger, sadness, every emotion you feel. And then go to sleep, because you’ve had a long day and you’re tired from all that screaming.
4. Go Out/Stay In With Friends
Whether you’re feeling a night out at the bars or a movie night at home with some popcorn, invite some friends too. Sometimes it feels like being alone is the only way to be after a breakup; after all, a person you spent a lot of time with is no longer in your life, so how can you compensate? With friends, of course! Your friends are there for you, and they want to make sure you’re okay. Spending time with friends can lighten your mood, make you laugh, and overall improve your situation. Even spending time with friends you don’t normally hang out with outside class/work/extracurriculars can prove to be an excellent source of camaraderie and fun in a difficult time.
5. Have Some Alone Time
Spending time with friends is important, but so is having some alone time after a breakup. Read a book, write some poetry, go for a long drive, play some videogames; do whatever you want that will make you happy. Spend some time with yourself, and rediscover who you are without another person. Be you, and learn to be alone without feeling lonely.
6. Find A Breakup Ritual
For me, it’s burning photographs, getting a new piercing or tattoo I’ve longed for, and writing angrily and incoherently in a journal or notebook until it’s completely illegible. For others it may involve dying their hair, breaking something, or eating a pint of ice cream while watching Sophie’s Choice. No matter what it is for you, find something that calms your soul and makes you happy, at least for a little while.
7. Enjoy Life!
Have fun, go out, party! Spend a little extra time on your makeup and hair. Stay at the bar or your friend’s place a little longer some nights. Have that second or third cup of coffee, because you can and it’s so good! Don’t waste time thinking about all the things you can’t or shouldn’t do; instead, spend time doing the things you enjoy .When you’re ready, go on dates; not because you’re looking to settle down, but because meeting new people is awesome! Try out a club you’ve always thought about joining but never had the courage to explore. Live a little! Do whatever makes you happy, whatever you enjoy. You are a beautiful person, and you are loved, respected, and appreciated, so take time to love, respect, and appreciate yourself. Trust me, you definitely deserve it.
