You know that feeling you get inside your stomach when you have been patiently waiting all year for this one day to come around and finally it is tomorrow night.

All the emotions you feel from anticipation is released into your body and you can barely eat, sleep or even think about anything else because you are just so excited for this moment to finally happen.

That is how I have felt for the past couple of weeks and will continue to feel until December 20th.

On September 25th, 2017 one of the closest people in my life, my boyfriend, left to bootcamp to become a Marine.

At the time of his departure I became distant with him. I'll be honest with you all, our love felt as if it was fading as I was just settling into my new home at Arizona State. I was torn in half because I knew I needed to let go of our relationship in order for us to grow properly.

I needed to be able to focus on myself in college while he focused on being the best he could be in boot camp. We had made a promise that we would try to work things out by the time he was home but my biggest fear was that he would realize he does not love me anymore. Better yet I was scared I would fall out of love and have to write a typical "Dear John" letter to him.

But neither of those fears are the case.

The first letter he wrote me, I broke down. I didn't attend his going away party and I wasn't even there for him when he left to his 13 week sentence in hell. I didn't treat him like I should have and I realized it all too late.

His first letter to me was merely him just asking how I was doing. He wanted an update on my life and told me that he is going through rough times but thinking of me helpshim. I had a sudden realization that how my life is going, how I feel, and the things I'm accomplishing actually matters to him.

I didn't understand it because I withdrew myself from his life but he still chose to care about mine.

And it was in that moment that I realized he loved me.

I know people who will tell me I'm too young and foolish to understand what love is. That being apart from someone for so long makes you think you want them back but you really don't. And yes, I understand that forty percent of long distance relationships end in a break up and there are so many more things to worry about.

But when I read this portion of Chase's most recent letter to me, I felt it inside my heart that I wanted him and I to be together again and I know in the future, being by his side through the ups and downs is going to make me the happiest person in the world.

"I just want you to know that no matter what, no matter where I am, I love you so much. I'm always here for you even if my life doesn't work for you. I'll always love you and will always be there for you if need me. I hope with all my heart we can be happy together again, if you'll have me. I know you're going far in life and the last thing I want is for my simple soldiers life getting in the way of your happiness. But every soldier needs something worth fighting for and your definitely worth it." - Love, Chase

I can proudly say with confidence in my veins and love in my heart that I love him and he loves me. I can say that I want him by my side for years and years to come and there is no one who will or could ever love me in the same way he loves me.

Communicating to him through paper and pencil has meant more to me than any other interaction I have ever had with anyone else on this planet. I am blessed to have someone who truly cares about me the way Chase Austin Howard does.

So I decided to publish this article the day before I finally see the love of my life so you all understand how much the pictures to come will mean to me.

Tomorrow I see my marine face to face for the first time in 13 weeks. I still have that feeling inside my stomach that doesn't allow me to eat, sleep or think. But I know that come 24 hours, I will be the happiest human alive with the love of my life standing right by my side.