I don't know about you, but a lot of times when I ask about someone's romantic life I hear things like: "Yeah, it's just complicated," "We don't have a label YET," "I don't know what we are" or even "Honestly, it doesn't even matter what we are..." I don't think this is necessarily a bad thing. You see, things are quickly changing with all these advances in technology and cultural shifts so it's normal for there to be changes in the way we date and remain in relationships.
Yet, we complain about how unstructured dating and being in a relationship has become. I think this comes from the fact that we don't know how to deal with changes. Our parents give us advice that was useful to them and most of it is still helpful, but they don't really know how technology has affected the way we interact on a romantic level, at least not at our age.
There are so many apps out there that offer young people different options. Some are a little more sophisticated and substantial, but there are others that are strictly casual and that's OK. Whether you're looking for "a good time," something serious, or someone to explore life with, there's an app for it and it's all about you being upfront about what it is that you want.
It doesn't matter how big our chances of finding someone are if we are not willing to redefine how we look at relationships though. Now, I'm not saying you have to be casual or serious if that's not what you want. But you don't necessarily need to have the type of relationship that perhaps you see in movies or like the one your parents have.
We lose so many opportunities because we think that a relationship must look like this or that and the reality of it is that nobody really knows what your relationship needs to look like because we are all different and we all have different needs to be fulfilled in a relationship.
We shift, we evolve, and we know what's best for us. We will move towards a relationship that even though might not be the most conventional, it still makes us happy.
If you want to pursue a relationship that falls outside of what's normal or accepted that's perfectly fine. If there's one thing that you can be sure of is that every relationship flows differently and we must accommodate accordingly. But if you like the conventional structure, then that's OK as well.
This doesn't mean you need to sacrifice what it is you truly desire, but you might want to look at your relationship and see if what you have with that significant other is worth being unconventional.
