Self harm is not a light subject by any means, and to many it is a taboo that borders on the fringe of basic human understanding, As a culture we think that self harm is either something someone does if they are seeking attention or are simply insane. Nothing could be farther from the truth.

How many times have you seen someone who was a victim of self-harm, looked at their appearance or lifestyle and thought to yourself: "Typical." Because if someone likes to wear dark clothes or they listen to heavy punk rock music, then of course they self-harm, right? Or, my favorite, if someone self-harms, they are then considered as attention seekers, right?

WRONG! WRONG! WRONG!

Usually if someone is self-harming it is most likely not for attention. People who self-harm are not walking around flashing their injuries to everyone and saying “Oh! Look!” It is usually the opposite, they are taking it to extreme lengths to hide it. And if someone by chance finds out or even notices, it feels like the end of the world. There are plenty of other reasons that people self-harm and one of those is not attention seeking.

I am a cheerful person. I am always smiling and laughing. My favorite color is pink. I play field hockey. I love to sing and dance. I love Taylor Swift. I volunteer. I enjoy being with my friends. I get good grades in school. I want to go to college. I have plans of being a nurse and getting married and having kids. I care about my future. Do I fit into your stereotype?

I've struggled with self-harm since I was 12/13 years old. Self-harm is something that affects so many people--people you wouldn't even imagine. So, please stop categorizing people and take the time to learn about what those around you go through on a daily basis. Self-harm is NOT a stereotype!

It isn't a topic to be romanticized. It isn't something that is beautiful. Self-harm is a twisted mentality that one thinks that they deserve to inflict pain upon oneself. It is not an Internet craze and it's not "an emo thing." It is not beautiful; it will not gain you attention. It is an addiction that has the potential to kill you, and it most definitely isn’t something that should be glamorized.

To the person who doesn't know what this struggle feels like:

Please don't judge. If you know someone that is struggling or has struggled with self-harm, understand what they are going through will be something that you will never be able to wrap your mind around. Don't add to their stress. All you can do is be there for them.

And to the person self-harming, here's some advice from the other side:

There’s help out there for you. You are going to meet people who understand what you’re going through. There are going to be people out there who will judge you and hate you, but only because they don not understand what you’re going through and they don’t know your story. And those people DO NOT MATTER! You are beautiful and you are human. You are allowed to go through hard times, but self harm won’t help. It is not going to be easy, but please seek help! That is the most important thing that you can do for yourself during this battle. You deserve a good life, you deserve to have fun, and most importantly you deserve to be happy. Easier said than done, stay strong and please be safe.

Remember that you will one day be rid of this. It will take a lot of work and it won’t be easy. But it’s worth it. One day it will no longer be something that you’re struggling with, but something you have overcome. Count the days you’re clean. Keep yourself accountable for your recovery, but don’t be too hard on yourself. It takes time, and sometimes you’ll take steps back. But your life is not dictated by your self-harm. You are not alone.

Here are some helpful resources:

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline

1-800-273-TALK (8255)

Crisis Text Line

TEXT "TWLOHA" TO 741-741

https://twloha.com

S.A.F.E. Alternatives

1-800-DONTCUT (800-366-8288)

http://www.safe-alternatives.com

Self-Injury Outreach and Support

http://sioutreach.org